Sunday, November 8, 2026

Video Game Review #635: Metroid Prime 2: Echoes

Metroid Prime 2: Echoes
Nintendo GameCube


Nostalgia Factor:

I haven't played this game since shortly after it came out back in 2004. I remember almost nothing about it, aside from being able to go back and forth between the light and dark worlds. I remember the game being difficult, and needing to look online to find out where to go next. I remember Dark Samus. I remember an area that had a Tron aesthetic going on. And I remember liking the first Metroid Prime more. That's about all I remember about the game.

Over 20 years have passed. I'm finally getting around to playing this game again. Special thanks to my cousin Ryan for loaning me his physical GameCube copy of the game. I stupidly traded my copy in several years ago because I had the Prime Trilogy collection for the Wii. Well, my Wii stopped reading the disc, so that Trilogy collection became useless to me, leaving me with no way to play Prime 2 (or 3, for that matter).

Let's see if my opinion of the game has changed after all this time.




Story:

I might take some heat for this, but I didn't really care about the game's story. Most of it is told through logs that you've scanned in. So you have to sit there and read what is going on. There are some computer rooms that have a dozen or so monitors, each one telling a little bit of the game's story. You have to stop, scan the monitor, read what it says, and then do the same thing for the next one. I'm sorry, but no. I'm not reading all that shit. It's not even that I don't like reading. I like novels. I read all the time. But I found it to be too disruptive here. Having to stop every ten seconds to read a bunch of text really breaks up the flow of the game. I'm here to play. I read everything for the first hour of the game, and then I just started skipping through everything. Oh well.

The basic gist is that Samus has arrived on an alien planet that's been overtaken by a mysterious, life consuming alien entity - just like the Chozo planet in the first game. But this tine, there is now a "dark world" that exists parallel to ours. Samus has to go back and forth between the dark and light worlds, transferring energy from the temples in the dark world over to the light world.... or something. A dark version of Samus tries to stop her off and on throughout the game. You end up defeating Dark Samus at the end and restoring life to the alien planet.

If people actually read this blog, they'd probably be flooding my inbox and shaking their fists at me for this gross, negligent, and completely inaccurate recap of the game's events. Oh well. Like I said, I wasn't really paying attention. I just wanted to play and keep exploring. Some reviewer I am!




Gameplay:

The first thing I noticed was how similar the gameplay is to the first game. The control scheme is exactly the same. The running, jumping, scanning, shooting, etc. It isn't until you start to get a little deeper into the game that you notice the differences.

The first major difference is the inclusion of the dark world. You can use portals to travel over to the dark side. Everything is bad there. Even the air itself hurts you. You have to use light bubbles as safe zones. You can stop inside them and they will refill your health. But as soon as you step out of them, your health starts to go down. It really helps add to the dark and oppressive atmosphere of the game. You truly feel like each time you enter the dark world, you have to move quickly and get things done with a sense of urgency.

Things you do in the dark world affect the light world. Like, if a bridge isn't lined up correctly in the light world, you can move it in the dark world. Then come back to the light world and cross over. The first time I played this game back in the early 2000s, this confused the hell out of me, and I needed an online walkthrough to get me through 90% of the game. But this time around, it clicked with me. I had a good time exploring and using trial and error to figure out what I needed to do and where I needed to go next.

That said, this game does start to drag after a while. As much as I liked this game, I was ready for it to be over at the end. The game sends you on a lot of different quests for hidden keys. At the end of the game, you need like 10 of them, and they are scattered all throughout the map. The clues they give you are extremely weak. And you need to use a special visor to see them, which makes them very easy to miss. This was easily my least favorite part of the game.

Aside from the light/dark world mechanic, this is still a fairly similar game to the first Prime. It carries over most of the original game's mechanics, but tweaks and improves things to make it a different experience. But the games are still very similar at their cores. 

I didn't enjoy this one as much as the original. All the backtracking and all the scouring for obscure hidden items all the time started to get old after a while. The world is huge, and the fact that there is a dark world with a vastly different map makes it even tougher to figure out where to go next. The game gives you hints, but I feel it doesn't help you out nearly as much as the first game. There were times when I had to let out a big sigh and say "okay, I guess I'll play this game" when game time came around each night. I had to force myself to get through it. That's something that never happened with the original. I was always happy to play it. This one, not so much.




Graphics:

I can't knock the game's graphics at all. For being an older game, it holds up great. It is bright and colorful. I love how the atmosphere switches to being so dark and oppressive in the dark world. The technology, the alien creatures, and the unique landscapes of the game all combine to create a very unique game environment. 

The Tron-like temple area in the last half of the game, with all the see through walls and moving circuitry and pieces of equipment is an area that has always appealed to me visually. Same with the boss area on the spider ball tracks. I love the contrast of the glowing lines in the equipment with the dark cavern walls. The bosses in general in this game are large and magnificent, and a big step up from the original game.




Sound:

Close your eyes while playing this, and you could swear you are playing the first game. There's not much of a difference from what I could tell. The sound effects are still the same. There's still that techno beat in the background keeping you going. That beat really adds to the sci-fi feel of the game, if that makes any sense at all. The atmospheric music is on point. The classic Metroid musical jingles still play when you save or load the game. It all sounds really good.




Overall:

While I found more to criticize in this game than I did the original, I still enjoyed it. The world of the game is fun to explore. I loved finding new abilities and then using these abilities to unlock new things. The whole game is like one big puzzle box that you are constantly solving and unfolding as you move forward. It sounds great. It looks beautiful. It's easy to pick up and play. It all makes for a fairly satisfying experience.

The main criticism I have is mainly with the tedious backtracking and fetch quests you have to endure. I must have passed through some of the same areas hundreds of times throughout the course of my playthrough. Back and forth, back and forth. It gets tiresome, especially when you unlock a new ability and see that you have to go aaaallllllll the way across multiple maps to get to the area where you need to use the new ability. And this happens a lot. Many times, you can only get from one area of the map to the other by passing through the dark world, which makes navigating from point A to point B even tougher. And don't even get me started on the search for the temple keys again. That shit was vile, and it made me want to not play the game on more than one occasion.

Overall, I look back fondly on my time with the game, criticisms and all. In fact, I even started to miss the game after I was done playing it. Part of me wanted to come back and play it again because I wanted to be back in the game's world. But I didn't. I have other things to play. But the fact that it had that pull on me should tell you something.

Good game? Yes. Great game? Maybe. Excellent game? Ehhh. I gave the first game an A+. And this game won't even score in the A range. But just because it isn't as good as the original Prime doesn't mean much of anything in the long run. A B+ is still a pretty darn good score, and I'd still recommend this game either way.


THE GRADE:
B+


For a complete index of all my past posts and game reviews, click

Sunday, November 1, 2026

2026 Things: October







10.1: Watched 1 episode of Wonka's The Golden Ticket (1.09). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (42.10). Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (King's 10 Best Stories for Thanksgiving). Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.16). Watched 1 episode of Unique Spaces (Inside an Abstract A-Frame Home in the Woods). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (38.11). 

10.2: Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.17). Listened to 1 episode of Retronauts (ep 143). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (38.12). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother (28.41).

10.3: Watched 2 episodes of Survivor (38.13, 38.14). Watched 2 episodes of The Sopranos (6.18, 6.19). Watched 1 episode of Signs of a Psychopath (1.01). 

10.4: Watched 2 episodes of The Sopranos (6.20, 6.21). Listened to 1 episode of The Cartridge Club (ep 97). Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Cinema (Sleepaway Camp Movie Commentary). Watched 1 episode of Signs of a Psychopath (1.02). 

10.5: Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (2.01). Listened to 1 episode of The 7th Rule (ep 333). Watched movie: Avengers: Endgame Encore. 

10.6: Listened to 1 episode of That's Bodacious, Dude! (ep 59). Watched 2 episodes of Traitors Canada (3.01, 3.02). Watched 1 episode of The Amazing Race (20.01). Watched movie: There Will Be Blood. 

10.7: Watched 1 episode of The Traitors Canada (3.03). Listened to 1 episode of Looking Back at Lost (212). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (42.11). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (2.02).

10.8: Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 290). Watched 2 episodes of Deadwood (1.01, 1.02). Watched 1 episode of The Amazing Race (20.02). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (2.03).

10.9: Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (The Dark Tower is Boring and More Hot Takes). Watched 2 episodes of Pantheon (2.01, 2.02). Watched 1 episode of The Amazing Race (20.03). Watched 2 episodes of Traitors Canada (3.04, 3.05). Listened to 1 episode of Retronauts (Micro 83). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (2.04).

10.10: Watched 2 episodes of Traitors Canada (3.06, 3.07). Finished video game: Metroid Prime 2: Echoes. Watched 1 episode of Signs of a Psychopath (1.03). Watched 1 episode of Unique Spaces (Inside an Ultra-Modern, Ruin-Inspired Home). Listened to 1 episode of The Retrograde (Games we want to forget so we can play them again). Listened to 1 episode of Creepy pod (Aokigahara Diary). 

10.11: Watched 1 episode of The Amazing Race (20.04). Listened to 1 episode of Cartridge Club (ep 98). Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 289). Listened to 1 episode of Retrovaniacs (ep 107). Watched 1 episode of Unique Spaces (Inside a Modern Moving Home on Railroad Tracks). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (2.05).

10.12: Listened to 1 episode of Stephen Kingcast (ep 28). Watched 1 episode of Deadwood (1.03). Watched movie: The Thing (1982). Listened to 1 episode of Sega Saturn Shiro (Mainline Cast ep 10).  Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (10.7.26 ep). Watched 1 episode of Star Trek Voyager (2.05). 

10.13: Watched 3 episodes of The Traitors Canada (3.08, 3.09, 3.10). Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Cinema (Jason Takes Manhattan/Leprechaun 3). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (2.06).

10.14: Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (42.12). Watched 1 episode of Deadwood (1.04). Watched 1 episode of The Amazing Race (20.05). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (10.13.26 ep).

10.15: Watched 1 episode of Deadwood (1.05). Watched 2 episodes of The Amazing Race (20.06, 20.07). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (2.07). Listened to 2 episodes of Creepy pod (A Warning, Gates). 

10.16: Watched movie: Desperation. Listened to 1 episode of Retrovaniacs (ep 108). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (2.08). Watched 2 episodes of The Amazing Race (20.08, 20.09). Watched 1 episode of Deadwood (1.06). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (10.70).

10.17: Listened to 1 episode of The Cartridge Club (ep 99). Finished video game: Resident Evil: The Umbrella Chronicles. Watched 1 episode of Deadwood (1.07).

10.18: Listened to 1 episode of Ear Biscuits (ep 88). Watched 1 episode of Deadwood (1.08). Finished video game: Bart vs The Space Mutants (Genesis). Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Cinema (Barbie and Oppenheimer). Watched 1 episode of VisionQuest (1.01).

10.19: Watched movie: Life of Pi. Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (2.09). Listened to 1 episode of Retronauts (ep 147). Listened to 1 episode of Creepy pod (The Tunnel). Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Gaming (At the Arcade Edition: Beat'Em Ups). Listened to 1 episode of The Retrograde (Game Awards: Full Breakdown and Reactions).

10.20: Watched 1 episode of Deadwood (1.09). Listened to 2 episodes of Stephen Kingcast (eps 186, 187). Watched 2 episodes of The Amazing Race (20.10, 20.11). Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (Thomas Jane on The Mist, Favorite Leading Men, and How We Fumbled the Internet).

10.21: Watched 2 episodes of Sons of Anarchy (2.10, 2.11). Listened to 1 episode of That's Bodacious, Dude! (ep 3). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (42.13). 

10.22: Watched 2 episodes of Survivor (51.01, 51.02). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (2.12). Watched movie: Host.

10.23: Listened to 1 episode of Looking Back at Lost (213). Listened to 3 episodes of Creepy pod (Midnight Game, Lost Twin - The Game, Greywater). Listened to 1 episode of Retronauts (ep 146). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (51.03). Listened to 1 episode of Retrovaniacs (ep 109). Watched 1 episode of Deadwood (1.10).

10.24: Watched 1 episode of Traitors Australia (1.01). Watched 2 episodes of Survivor (51.04, 51.05). Watched 1 episode of VisionQuest (1.02). Watched 1 episode of Star Trek Voyager (2.06). Watched 1 episode of Deadwood (1.11). Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (Dennis Etchison's The Mist). Watched 1 episode of Unique Spaces (Inside a Dream Penthouse Overlooking Central Park). 

10.25: Listened to 1 episode of Retronauts (Micro 85). Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 291). Listened to 1 episode of The Retrograde (GTA6: New Secrets and Predictions). Watched 1 episode of Deadwood (1.12).

10.26: Watched movie: When Evil Lurks. Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (2.13). Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 292). Listened to 1 episode of The Cartridge Club (ep 155). Watched 1 episode of Star Trek Voyager (2.07).

10.27: Watched 3 episodes of The Traitors Australia (1.02, 1.03, 1.04). Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (Dark Tower VI: Song of Susannah). Listened to 1 episode of Creepy pod (1000 Kings). Listened to 1 episode of The 7th Rule (ep 335). Finished video game: Tomb Raider Underworld. Watched movie: Ghostbusters II.

10.28: Watched 1 episode of Silo (3.01). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (42.14). Watched 1 episode of Traitors Australia (1.05). Listened to 1 episode of Retrovaniacs (ep 110). Watched 1 episode of VisionQuest (1.03).
**The Milwaukee Brewers win the World Series**

10.29: Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Cinema (RoboDoc Series Review). Listened to 4 episodes of Creepy pod (Out in the Woods, Come Follow Me, My Wife, Clockwork). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (51.06). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (10.14.26 ep). Watched 1 episode of Traitors Australia (1.06).

10.30: Watched 1 episode of Deadwood (2.01). Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Gaming (ep 66). Watched 1 episode of Silo (3.02). Watched 1 episode of Signs of a Psychopath (1.04). Watched 1 episode of Traitors Australia (1.07). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge Australia (1.01). Watched 1 episode of VisionQuest (1.04). Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 294).

10.31: Watched 1 episode of Traitors Australia (1.08). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge Australia (1.02). Listened to 1 episode of The Retrograde (New Year's Eve Power Hour Countdown with 2024 Predictions). 



Most consumed media (minimum of 6)

18 episodes of The Traitors watched (10 Can and 8 Aussie)
13 episodes of Deadwood watched
13 episodes of Sons of Anarchy watched
12 episodes of Creepy pod played
11 episodes of The Amazing Race watched
10 episodes of Survivor watched
8 movies watched
7 episodes of The Challenge watched (5 US and 2 Aussie)
6 episodes of The Sopranos watched



For a complete index of all my past posts and game reviews, click

Saturday, October 31, 2026

Video Game Review #634: The Simpsons: Bart vs the Space Mutants

The Simpsons: Bart vs the Space Mutants
Sega Genesis


Nostalgia Factor:

About 6 months ago, I reviewed the NES version of this game. You can find that review here. For all its warts, I gave it a decent review score. It ended up getting a B from me. This was probably fueled by nostalgia, as I know the game itself isn't that great. But I just couldn't help but feel charmed by it and all the memories it brought back.

It was when I was doing research for my review that I discovered there was a Genesis port of this game. I hadn't known that before. Right off the bat, I was intrigued. I figured it would be pretty much the same game, but with better graphics, music, and controls. I made it a goal to play it someday.

That's what brings us here. Let's jump in.



Story:

I'm not going to recap the game's story again, as it is literally the exact same story as the NES version of the game, and I'm a lazy bitch. Go read that review if you want the scoop.



Gameplay:

Again, I'm not going to recap how the game works. Go read the NES review. 

I will tell you that things haven't changed much from the NES version of the game. Same crappy controls, same gimmicky stage design. In fact, I found this game to be less enjoyable than the NES version for some reason I couldn't quite put my finger on. It's pretty much the exact same game, with small, subtle differences. But I struggled with it.

The controls are not good. You'd think with the Genesis controller, they could have made it easier to run and do long jumps with the extra button on the controller. But they didn't utilize it at all, and you get the same awkward, almost unplayable platform mechanics yet again. But for some unknown, subtle reason (like I said), I found the game to be even more frustrating and difficult. I was dying left and right, and reloading save states like a madman.

I don't know if the gameplay is truly any different, or if I'm just frustrated with it because they had so many opportunities to make this game better with this Genesis port, yet they didn't. I had no fun playing through this game. The whole time I was like "why didn't I just stop with the NES version?" It's almost ruined my enjoyment of the game altogether. Definitely a big mistake playing this one. The plus side is that with save states, you can beat this game in one night. Without them? I shudder to think of it.




Graphics:

I don't know how this is possible, but they somehow managed to make this game look even worse than the NES version. The NES game didn't look great, but you can tell they tried really hard. It had its charm. You'd think with the 16-bit power of the Genesis they could easily top this. But no. It just looks garish and bad.

It's not that the Genesis can't do The Simpsons. I haven't reviewed Virtual Bart or Bart's Nightmare yet (thank god) but I remember them looking much better than this when I was a kid. They looked like how the Simpsons should look in 16-bit. But this is just embarrassing. It's more colorful than the NES game, sure. And I think if you lined up both games side-by-side, a good number of people would say this one looks better. But I just think it's hideous.




Sound:

Where's the Simpsons music? Come on! There is no music from the show to be found in this game. It's all generic (although serviceable) stage music that goes in one ear and out the other. I just finished this game about a week ago and already, if you asked me to identify a track from this game's soundtrack, I wouldn't be able to do it.

Even the NES game had music from the show. I understand there's probably some kind of legal or licensing issue at play here, but this is a grievous mistake.




Overall:

In case you couldn't tell, I didn't enjoy this. I just don't understand how they could have flubbed this port so badly. It wasn't that good of a game to begin with. But they made it worse. Yikes.

I can't recommend this to anyone, even if you are a fan of the NES game. It will result in nothing but disappointment. It can be easily skipped by everyone, unless you're a weirdo like me and let your curiosity get the better of you.

I only give it the "high" grade of a D because at its heart, it is still pretty much identical to the original as far as gameplay. And in these reviews, I'm always harping about how gameplay is the only thing that matters. Not graphics, sound, story, etc. The gameplay. So if it is pretty much the same game, how would I justify the drop from a B to a D- or an F? Even a D is hard to justify, but I can't in good faith give it anything higher than this. 

Play it if you must, but this is an easy skip for most gamers. Totally not worth your precious time. I know it wasn't worth mine.



THE GRADE:
D


For a complete index of all my past posts and game reviews, click

Friday, October 23, 2026

Re-Review #28: Final Fantasy VII

Final Fantasy VII
PlayStation

For my original review of the game, click


Normally I wouldn't say that it is necessary to go back and read my original review before checking out my re-review, but I think it is here. Final Fantasy VII is a game I have a great reverence for. It was my first ever PS1 game. It was my first Final Fantasy game. It was my first real turn based RPG. I say nothing but gushing things for it in my original review, which you can find linked above. I think it is very important to know, coming into this re-review, just how important this game was to me growing up. My review encapsulates that quite well.

Nowadays, here in 2026, I often hear talk online about how the game isn't as good it is made out to be. It's just a product of nostalgia. The graphics haven't aged well. Final Fantasy VI is better. The remake is better. It's actually a mid game. Blah blah blah. I don't care what anyone else has to say. This is my favorite game, and it probably will be until the day I die. I'm not saying it to join any bandwagons, or because I don't have any original opinions of my own. I truly love this game. I played it at just the right time in my life. It was a massive part of my teenage years when I was going through high school. I felt a real connection to the game. I played through it a dozen times. I even wrote fan fiction about the game, and read what others were saying about the game online. It is one of the first instances I can remember of using the internet for something that wasn't educational. 

I have fond memories of printing up fan-written short stories from the library, and bringing home giant binders of them stapled together, where I would read them in my bedroom. I remember this one particularly vicious story about Cid and his relationship with Shera. The whole story was just him beating her, screaming at her, and abusing her. There was no other plot to it aside from him torturing her. It was the grimmest thing I've ever read. I still think about it to this day. If you wrote that short story and you're reading this, I want you to know that you're one sick fuck, alright?

Anyway, I'm going off tangent. I tend to do that when talking about Final Fantasy VII. Let's talk about how I felt through my 2026 playthrough of the game. I'll start by reminding us all that my last playthrough was back in September of 2016, almost ten years ago to the exact date. That's probably the longest I've ever gone in my life without playing Final Fantasy VII.

Coming in, I was worried that all the online naysayers would be right. The game wouldn't be any good. I would be able to see all its flaws. I'd have a terrible time with it. 

Turns out, I didn't have to worry about that at all. Right off the bat, I was drawn into the game. To use an obvious comparison, it was like coming home to family. I was hit with a warm, cozy feeling as I stepped into the game. I don't know if I'm just simply incapable of looking at this game objectively because of my history with it, or what. But I loved it.

THAT SAID, do I still think this is the greatest game ever made? I'm actually not sure. Like I said, I still liked the game and had a fun time playing it. The story is great, the music is great. I love the atmosphere of the game. I don't think the graphics have even aged that poorly, to be honest with you. I still think it looks quite charming.

My biggest problem with the game was its easiness. I zipped through the game with little to no trouble at all. I only had to stop and grind twice. The first time was near the Nibelheim reactor (where you have the choice of slides to go down that leads to different items). And the second time was right at the end of the game before going into the final boss rush. 

I used Cait Sith as one of my main party members. In the dozen times I've played through this game in my life, I had never used him before. I always just assumed he sucked from the few times you HAVE to use him in this game, like during the Junon escape. But he actually turned out to be a pretty capable character. His physical attacks were strong and he seemed proficient with magic. He had good limit breaks, too. Next time I play through this game (which will probably be a very long time), I will have to use Vincent as one of my main characters.

All in all, I still think this is a game that holds up well. I'll never understand the vitriol that some people seem to have for it online. Do they truly think it isn't a good game, or do they just think it is overrated? I really hope it is the second option.

This is still one of my favorite RPGs of all time. Trying to look at it through a more objective lens, I do think that the gap is closing a little bit. Xenogears is starting to creep up on this game. I'm eager to play through FF6 and Chrono Trigger someday to see if my opinions on those games have changed at all. I used to think they were leagues behind FF7, and I'm curious to see if that is different now.

As far as best game of all time, this is something I'm really going to have to sit down and think about. There are so many awesome games out there. Is this really better than Ocarina of Time, Ghost of Tsushima, Horizon Zero Dawn, etc? I don't know. It was certainly the most impactful game I've ever played. But the best? Hmmmm....

I'm nearly up to 1000 games played in my life. It's always been a goal of mine to do an ultimate "worst to best" ranking when I get there. Final Fantasy VII has always been penciled in as the #1 game on my list. But I'm really going to have to think about it now. What was once an easy A+ game for me has slipped just a tiny bit down to an A game in my eyes. Good game. I'd say even a great game. But the best ever? We shall see. But the fact that it is even in the conversation should tell you all you need to know.


THE GRADE:
A


For a complete index of all my past posts and game reviews, click

Friday, October 9, 2026

Video Game Review #633: SpongeBob SquarePants: Battle for Bikini Bottom - Rehydrated



SpongeBob SquarePants: Battle for Bikini Bottom - Rehydrated
PlayStation 4


Before Playing:

SpongeBob is something that has always evaded me. I'm aware of its existence. I know people love it. My kid likes the show. Despite being surrounded by SpongeBob, I've somehow never watched an episode of it before. And I'm not even saying that to be "elitist" or snobby. I've seen clips of the show before. It always seems very hectic and... scatterbrained? I don't know how to describe it. But it's never appealed to me. I was the same way growing up with Ren and Stimpy, if that gives you any insight into how my brain works.

Then why am I playing this game, you may ask? I got it earlier in the year for my son for his birthday. He didn't seem to like it that much, and focused on the other games I got him: Ratchet & Clank and Sackboy. When he finally got tired of those games several months later, he came back to SpongeBob. I ended up playing through the game with him, and having a good time with it. It feels like a throwback to other classic 3D platformers like Mario 64 and Banjo-Kazooie. Okay, maybe not as good as those games, but in the same vein. And yes I know this is a remastered PS2 game, so that is probably why it has that classic feel.

I liked the game so much that I ended up playing through the game and getting the platinum trophy on my own separate save file. I think I ended up liking the game more than my kid, and I've managed to do it without seeing an actual episode of the source material. And that's where we kick off this review. I suppose I've already spoiled that I like the game, so let's jump into why that is, shall we?
  



Story:

My limited knowledge of SpongeBob was enough to get me through the game. Squidward has created these evil robots to take over Bikini Bottom, but they've become too powerful and have begun independently causing chaos without him. He has completely lost control of them.

And that's where you come in. Playing as SpongeBob, you have to make it through the stages, clearing out the boss robots. At the end, you win, and free Bikini Bottom from the tyranny of these evil robots. This is an extremely vague retelling of the game's storyline. If you've watched SpongeBob before, you will probably notice that the game is jam packed full of Easter eggs and side plots from the show. What those Easter eggs are, I can't tell you. But with the level of detail that seemingly went into making this game an authentic SpongeBob experience, I am sure they are plentiful.

Both my wife and son made sure to tell me that this was just like playing through the show. I suppose that should be high honors for the people that made this game.




Gameplay:

This is a pretty fun 3D platformer, akin to something I used to play a lot in the olden days of gaming. Let's compare it to Mario 64 as a point of reference. You have a hub world. The stages are opened up by collecting spatulas, which are the equivalent of gold stars in Mario. Each stage has about 6 or 7 spatulas within it. Each spatula comes with a generic description that kinda/sorta points you in the right direction. You don't have to collect every spatula in every level. You just have to collect enough to keep unlocking more levels until you get to the end of the game.

As you progress, you quickly learn that you can switch off between characters. You start as SpongeBob, who is the most well-rounded character. Patrick is strong and better at fighting. He can solve puzzles that SpongeBob can't, and vice versa. But there is also a third character: Sandy. Sandy was my favorite character to play as. Sandy can use her lasso to swing to locations other characters can't reach. She's good in combat. She has a useful glide maneuver, too. I like Sandy.

If you want to collect as many spatulas as you can, you'll need to learn when to switch between the three characters. Many spatulas that are unattainable to SpongeBob can be unlocked by other characters, and vice versa. It's all about recognizing which character you need to use, and in which situation.

If you've played 3D platformers like this before (Mario, Banjo-Kazooie, etc), nothing this game throws at you should surprise you. You fight enemies, you collect spatulas, you pick up power-ups, etc. Every once in a while you fight a boss character. The bosses were a highlight of the game to me. I always had fun squaring off against them.

To break up the monotony of the 3D platforming, there are other activities in the game, like racing or sliding down hills that have multiple branching paths. Nothing too crazy, though. 

I found this game to be quite enjoyable to play, even as someone who doesn't really know anything about SpongeBob. It is easy to pick up and play, the levels are fun to explore, and everything moves along at a nice, brisk pace. It is a very old school feeling game, which makes sense as this is a remaster of a PS2 game. If I liked it as much as I did knowing nothing about SpongeBob, I can only imagine that this must be a real treat for fans of the franchise.




Graphics/Sound:

No complaints here. I think the game looks great. It is bright, colorful, and, from what I can see, very faithful to the source material. I think any fan of SpongeBob should be extremely pleased by the look and feel of this game.

Not only does the game look good, it sounds good, too. The voice acting is top-notch. I really enjoy the chill music, too. My wife would often say that it sounded like I was watching an episode of the show as I was playing it - which is the highest compliment you can give to a game like this. You can really tell a lot of love and care was put into making this an authentic SpongeBob experience. And it worked, big time.




Overall:

I didn't expect to like this as much as I did. It fits right in with all those classic 3D platformers I played as a teenager growing up. No doubt, I would have LOVED this if I'd played it back on the PS2. Heck, I love it now, and the original game is what, 23 years old now? It's really held up quite well. Sure, this is a remaster. No doubt it looks and plays better than the original. But I'm certain that it's close enough to the original, that I would have loved the original just as much if I had played it growing up.

I consider this a must-play title, especially for fans of 3D platformers. It's challenging but without being frustrating. It's quick and easy to play through without being too short of an experience. Everything about it is just right, especially if you are going for a platinum trophy (which I was. Score!). I'm not going to say this game breaks the mold or does anything too original, because it doesn't. But it does what it does very well. Again, this was a pleasant surprise, and I'm not even a SpongeBob guy. If you like 3D platformers and you are a fan of the franchise, you need to play this yesterday.


THE GRADE:
B+


If I liked it so much, why "only" a B+? As fun as it was, it didn't do anything too horribly original. Plus, I can't ever see myself coming back and playing this again someday, especially in a world where games like Banjo-Kazooie or Mario 64 exist. It's a fun game, but it's not a needle mover for me.



For a complete index of all my past posts and game reviews, click

Thursday, October 1, 2026

2026 Things: September



9.1: Watched movie: The Whisper Man. Watched 1 episode of Big Brother (28.26). Watched 2 episodes of Survivor (37.04, 37.05). Listened to 1 episode of Creepy pod (Aftermath). Listened to 1 episode of The Cartridge Club (ep 92). Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.02). Watched 1 episode of Batman: The Caped Crusader (2.08).

9.2: Watched 2 episodes of Batman: The Caped Crusader (2.09, 2.10). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (42.06). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (37.06). Watched 1 episode of Hulk Hogan: Real American (1.01). Watched 1 episode of 11.22.63 (1.03). Watched 1 episode of X-Men '97 (1.01).

9.3: Watched The Punisher: One Last Kill. Watched 1 episode of Star Trek Voyager (1.16). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother (28.27). Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.03). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (37.07). Watched 1 episode of X-Men '97 (1.02). Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Gaming (Assassin's Creed Black Flag Resynced).

9.4: Watched 1 episode of 11.22.63 (1.04). Watched movie: Terrifier 3. Listened to 1 episode of Looking Back at Lost (209). Watched 2 episodes of Survivor (37.08, 37.09). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother (28.28). Listened to 1 episode of Creepy pod (BEN Drowned). Listened to 1 episode of The 7th Rule (ep 330).

9.5: Watched 1 episode of 11.22.63 (1.05). Watched 1 episode of Hulk Hogan: Real American (1.02). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother (28.29). Watched 2 episodes of Survivor (37.10, 37.11). Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Cinema (Kevin Smith's Clerks). Listened to 1 episode of The Cartridge Club (ep 93). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (10.58).

9.6: Watched 1 episode of X-Men '97 (1.03). Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 285). Listened to 1 episode of Retronauts (ep 139). Watched movie: The Mandalorian and Grogu. Watched 1 episode of Death of the Pastor's Wife (1.01).

9.7: Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (Talkin' Tower with Matt Christman). Listened to 1 episode of Retrovaniacs (ep 103). Listened to 1 episode of The Quick Save Club (ep 12). Watched 1 episode of Hulk Hogan: Real American (1.03). Listened to 1 episode of That's Bodacious, Dude! (ep 1). Listened to 1 episode of Fantasy Football Happy Hour (8.6.26 ep). Watched 1 episode of Star Trek Voyager (2.01). Watched movie: Back to the Future. Listened to 1 episode of Ear Biscuits (ep 86). 

9.8: Watched 1 episode of Big Brother (28.30). Listened to 1 episode of Stephen Kingcast (ep 8). Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (The Simpsons' Not It: King in Springfield). Listened to 1 episode of The Retrograde (Super Mario Bros. Wonder). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (10.60). Watched 1 episode of Unique Spaces (Frank Lloyd Wright's Hidden Woodland Utopia). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (37.12). Watched movie: Back to the Future: Part II. Watched 1 episode of 11.22.63 (1.06).

9.9: Watched 1 episode of X-Men '97 (1.04). Watched movie: Boogie Nights. Listened to 1 episode of The Quick Save Club (ep 8). Watched 1 episode of 11.22.63 (1.07). Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.04). Listened to 1 episode of Sega Saturn Shiro (Live Show 7.23.21). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (1.01).

9.10: Watched 2 episodes of X-Men '97 (1.05, 1.06). Watched 1 episode of 11.22.63 (1.08). Finished video game: SpongeBob SquarePants: Battle for Bikini Bottom – Rehydrated. Listened to 2 episodes of Creepy pod (The Holders of the Beginning & Depression, hospital). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (10.61). Watched 2 episodes of Survivor (37.13, 37.14). Listened to 1 episode of The Retrograde (Game Awards Predictions and Criticisms).

9.11: Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Cinema (Craig Gillespie's Supergirl). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (1.02). Watched 2 episodes of Big Brother (28.31, 28.32). Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 286). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (42.07). Watched 1 episode of X-Men '97 (1.07).

9.12: Watched 1 episode of Hulk Hogan: Real American (1.04). Watched 1 episode of The Traitors Canada (2.01). Listened to 1 episode of Looking Back at Lost (210). Watched 1 episode of Death of the Pastor's Wife (1.02). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (38.01). Watched 1 episode of X-Men '97 (1.08). Watched 1 episode of Unique Spaces (Cali Home Made From Its Own Mountain). 

9.13: Listened to 2 episodes of The Quick Save Club (ep 9, ep 10). Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.05). Listened to 1 episode of Stephen Kingcast (ep 184). Listened to 1 episode of Retrovaniacs (ep 104). Listened to 1 episode of Ear Biscuits (ep 87). Watched 1 episode of X-Men '97 (1.09). Watched movie: Back to the Future: Part III.

9.14: Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Cinema (Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3). Listened to 1 episode of Retronauts (Micro 82). Listened to 1 episode of Fantasy Football Happy Hour (9.10.26 ep). Watched movie: Parenthood. Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (1.03).

9.15: Watched 1 episode of X-Men '97 (1.10). Listened to 1 episode of The 7th Rule (ep 332). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother (28.33). Watched 1 episode of The Traitors Canada (2.02).

9.16: Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (42.08). Listened to 1 episode of The Quick Save Club (ep 11). Watched 1 episode of The Traitors Canada (2.03). Watched 1 episode of Star Trek Voyager (2.02).

9.17: Watched 1 movie: Sicario. Watched 1 episode of X-Men '97 (2.01). Watched 1 episode of Death of the Pastor's Wife (1.03). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother (28.34). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (1.04). Listened to 1 episode of The Cartridge Club (ep 95).

9.18: Watched 2 episodes of X-Men '97 (2.02, 2.03). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (38.02). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother (28.35). Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.06). Listened to 1 episode of The Retrograde (Spider-Man 2 Review). Watched 1 episode of Star Trek Voyager (2.03).

9.19: Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.07). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (10.67). Listened to 1 episode of The Stephen Kingcast (ep 185). Listened to 1 episode of That's Bodacious, Dude! (ep 2). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (38.03). Watched 2 episodes of Traitors Canada (2.04, 2.05). Watched 1 episode of Unique Spaces (Modernist Home That Flows Like Water). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (1.05). Watched 2 episodes of X-Men '97 (2.04, 2.05).

9.20: Listened to 1 episode of Retronauts (ep 140). Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 287). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (38.04). Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.08). Watched 1 episode of X-Men '97 (2.06). Watched 1 episode of Star Trek Voyager (2.04).

9.21: Watched 1 episode of X-Men '97 (2.07). Listened to 1 episode of The Cartridge Club (ep 96). Watched movie: The Fantastic Four: First Steps. Watched 1 episode of Unique Spaces (Inside a Woodland Home Built Over Water).

9.22: Watched 1 episode of X-Men '97 (2.08). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (38.05). Watched 2 episodes of Big Brother (28.36, 28.37). Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (Dark Tower V: Wolves of the Calla). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (1.06).

9.23: Listened to 1 episode of Retrovaniacs (ep 105). Listened to 1 episode of Digging Dexter (Introduction). Listened to 1 episode of Creepy pod (The Holders Series Part 1). Watched 1 episode of X-Men '97 (2.09). Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.09). Watched 3 episodes of The Traitors Canada (2.06, 2.07, 2.08). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (42.09).

9.24: Listened to 1 episode of Staff Picks (Zodiac). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (1.07). Finished video game: Final Fantasy VII. Watched 1 episode of Big Brother (28.38). Watched 2 episodes of The Traitors Canada (2.09, 2.10). Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.10).

9.25: Watched 1 episode of Survivor (38.06). Listened to 1 episode of Looking Back at Lost (211). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (1.08). Watched movie: U.S. Marshals. Watched 1 episode of Big Brother (28.39). Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.11). 

9.26: Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 288). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (38.07). Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.12). Watched 3 episodes of Wonka's The Golden Ticket (1.01, 1.02, 1.03). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (10.68). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (1.09). 

9.27: Listened to 1 episode of Sega Saturn Shiro (Mainline Cast ep 9). Watched 2 episodes of Wonka's Golden Ticket (1.04, 1.05). Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (Frank Darabont's The Mist). Watched movie: Resident Evil (2026). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (38.08).  

9.28: Listened to 1 episode of Creepy pod (Holders Series Pt 2). Watched movie: The Mist. Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.13). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (1.10). Listened to 1 episode of Retrovaniacs (ep 106). Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Cinema (ep 77). Listened to 1 episode of The Retrograde (F-Zero X 25th Anniversary Review). 

9.29:Watched 2 episodes of Sons of Anarchy (1.11, 1.12). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother (28.40). Finished video game: Pac-Man. Watched 1 episode of Wonka's The Golden Ticket (1.06). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (38.09). Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.14).

9.30: Listened to 1 episode of Retro Blast (Grand Theft Auto III). Watched 1 episode of The Sopranos (6.15). Watched 2 episodes of Wonka's The Golden Ticket (1.07, 1.08). Listened to 1 episode of Fantasy Football Happy Hour (9.25.26 ep). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (38.10). Watched 1 episode of Sons of Anarchy (1.13). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (10.66).



Most consumed media (minimum of 6)

21 episodes of Survivor watched
19 episodes of X-Men '97 watched
15 episodes of Big Brother watched
14 episodes of The Sopranos watched
13 episodes of Sons of Anarchy watched
13 movies watched
10 episodes of The Traitors Canada watched
8 episodes of Wonka's The Golden Ticket watched
6 episodes of Creepy pod played
6 episodes of 11.22.63 watched
6 episodes of The FF Dynasty played



For a complete index of all my past posts and game reviews, click

Tuesday, September 29, 2026

Video Game Review #632: Pac-Man

Pac-Man
Arcade


Nostalgia Factor:

Pac-Man is a game that's been around for my entire life. It came out in 1980, two years before I was born. My dad had the Atari 2600 version of the game in his rec room. I remember all the merch, specifically an activity book that was full of mazes and pictures to color. Pac-Man cereal, Pac-Man plushies. The game itself was a staple at every arcade, movie theater, bowling alley, or restaurant growing up. Everywhere you turned, there was Pac-Man.

Despite being a Pac-Man fan, I was never very good at the game. It didn't matter if it was the arcade or the 2600 version of it: I sucked. I could clear four or five stages at max - and that was on a good run. It didn't matter how much I practiced at home, or how many quarters I put into the arcade machine. I just wasn't good at the game. Over time, Pac-Man became a game that I would walk past or ignore when perusing the arcades. I hate to say this, but the game never really did anything for me. It didn't grab me the same way that something like Mario, Donkey Kong, Moon Patrol, or Asteroids did.

That's probably why I'm up to review #632, and I still haven't reviewed the game yet. You'd think I'd have done it a long time ago. What prompted me to sit down and finally pour some decent time into the game? I don't know. I like having an arcade game in the queue of my Retropie that I can come back to every few days or so and try to beat my high score. Centipede, Alien Syndrome, and Tetris have been my go-to games here in 2026 so far. But I was ready for something new. I decided on Pac-Man.

So here were are. Let's dive into this 46 year old game. Would it finally win me over? Is it still worth playing today? I'm excited to talk about it.




Story:

I really, really hope you aren't coming into Pac-Man and expecting any kind of strong storyline. You're Pac-Man. You run from ghosts. You eat pellets. We all laugh and have a good time. But there really isn't any attempt at story telling going on here.

The ghosts have names. Every once in a while, you'll see a short animation of Pac-Man turning the tables on the ghosts. My favorite is when the ghost gets caught on a snare that rips its clothes. But that's about all you get when it comes to story. I suppose I do have some questions. Like, if the ghosts aren't really ghosts, and they are just wearing ghost outfits, then who are they really? And what do they have against Pac-Man? But the game doesn't care about any of that.




Gameplay:

I'm going to pretend like you're a space alien from the year 2587, and you have never heard of this game before. You control a little yellow character named Pac-Man. You are looking down on Pac-Man from an overhead perspective. Pac-Man is in a maze filled with pellets. There are ghosts in a cage in the middle of the maze. Your goal is to explore the maze fully, eating up the pellets as you go. Once you've eaten them all, you clear the maze and you move onto the next one.

You must do this while being pursued by the ghosts, who are being released from their cages one by one. They will relentlessly pursue you until they catch you. If they so much as touch you, you lose a life and have to restart the level. Luckily, the pellets you've already eaten are still gone.

The thing I always liked about the game is how you can eat power pellets to turn the tables on your ghost attackers. Each stage holds four power pellets, each one located near one of the room's four corners. As soon as you eat one, all the ghosts turn blue. They start running from you instead of attacking you. If you touch them while they're blue, they get sent back to the cage in the middle of the room, and you earn points. The more ghosts you banish, the more points you get. If you can string together a combo of all four ghosts after eating a power pellet, you earn over 1,000 points. That's really the goal of the game: to earn points and get the high score.

The further you get into the game, the more difficult it becomes. The ghosts become faster, the power pellets lose their effectiveness. Everything becomes more difficult. Like I said earlier, I've always been terrible at this game. Even playing it for this review, I couldn't clear more than seven or eight stages before losing all my lives. My highest score was about 33,000 something - which I understand isn't very good. There's people out there who have probably hit a million points.

*Edit - I just looked and apparently you can earn over three million points if you get a perfect run. And how many levels are there? 256!! I've made it to 7 or 8!!

I understand there are exploits out there and ways to master the game. I've read Ready Player One. I feel like if I realllly wanted to, I could study up on the game and learn some of the exploits, and get better at it. But where's the fun in that? I like taking my own approach, regardless of whether or not it is successful. I'm here to have fun, not do homework.

But about the fun thing. Is this game really that fun? I don't know. I like the game. For the most part, I enjoy playing it. But that enjoyment never lasts more than a few moments. I start a game. I die within minutes. I play another round, where again I die within minutes. And then I'm done. I never want to play this game over and over. It's not something you can sink hours into. Even when I was a kid and this was one of the few games I had, I didn't put much time into it. It's hard to explain, but like I said earlier, this game doesn't really do much for me.

I acknowledge that the game is popular. I understand why people like it. It's just not something I'm crazy about. I'd almost always rather be playing something else. That's not a knock on Pac-Man, or an attack on its legacy. If anything, it's a me problem. I do like the game in short bursts. But aside from that, I could take it or leave it. 

Even saying that feels blasphemous.




Graphics:

This game has a timeless feel to it. It came out in 1980, and it looks better than a lot of games that came out after it. It's not ugly. It hasn't "aged poorly." It looks great. It's simple, it gets its point across. It accomplishes everything it sets out to do visually. The second your eyes notice this game, you know exactly what it is.




Sound:

This is a game that you can identify solely by sound. It's light on music. You only hear a few brief musical jingles off and on as you play - mainly when you start a new game or reach a level interlude. What makes the game identifiable is the sound Pac-Man makes when he munches the pellets. I can't really describe it in words. It's just something that you know as soon as you hear it.

The sound when you eat a large pellet is great. Even the sound when you lose a life is great. Whether it is the sound effects or the brief music clips, every sound this game makes is iconic.




Overall:

I feel like I've been tough on this game. One thing we all need to remember is that everyone has different tastes. Not everything is for everybody. There are things I like about the game. I like the visuals and the music. I like the premise of the game. Like I said, it is fun to play in short bursts. What I mainly appreciate is the enormous impact Pac-Man had on the video game industry, and the lasting legacy that has endured. Video games may not be where they are right now without Pac-Man.

That said, it's not my favorite game. Anyone who's been following this blog from the beginning knows that I'm not big on "high score" games, where your only goal is to complete a loop of increasingly difficult challenges until you eventually die. You can't beat the game, you can only hope to get the highest score. I like an ending. I like a goal to strive for. Sure, getting a high score is a goal, but I like to be able to beat the game. Plus, no matter how good of a run I have, I never seem to get a very good score. The ghosts always find a way to corner me or cut me off, no matter how quickly I react to them or try to throw them off my scent by juking or acting unpredictably. Maybe I just suck at the game. Maybe my experience is normal and most people can't clear more than a handful of stages. Whatever it is, I'll stand by my original statement. Pac-Man just isn't my thing. I don't hate it. I enjoy it in small bursts. But like I said, if I walk into an arcade with a bunch of different games to pick from, Pac-Man would probably be at the bottom of my list to play.

My review score will be interesting, because while I admit the game "isn't my thing" I will NEVER say that it is bad or that it sucks. I know it is a good game. It's not for me, but it is a good game. So I'll compromise and give this a slightly positive review score. Not high enough to make people think I loved this game, but not low enough where people are like "wtf, how could someone give Pac-Man a bad review?" Hopefully that works for you. Not that I care.


THE GRADE:
B-

For a complete index of all my past posts and game reviews, click

Monday, September 28, 2026

VHS Tape #33: American Idol 5 Tape 2



Here we go with my 33rd old VHS tape that I'm indexing. As you can probably tell by the title of the tape, it is simply a continuation of my last one, which had nothing on it but American Idol 5.


(00:00:00)

American Idol 5 - Day 2 of Hollywood auditions
 - Woman stresses out about being sick and sucks when she goes up to sing. The judges still put her through though.
 - People who suck make lame excuses
 - The other group on the Hollywood tour notices that Ryan Seacrest has a star on the walkway but Simon does not, and comment on it
 - Brittenum twins audition and make it through
 - Touring contestants visit the Kodak Theater
 - Brittenum twins get mad over the criticism directed their way
 - Gina Glocksen, David Radford, Ace Young, and Kevin Covais all sing the same song and make it through
 - Other set of black twins audition but they don't make it through
 - Touring contestants visit the Magic Castle
 - Young cowboy auditions and makes it through
 - Brittenum twins continue to bicker
 - Chris Daughtry sings The First Cut is the Deepest and makes it through
 - Mandisa moves on
 - Katharine McPhee sings I Know I'll Never Love This Way Again and advances
 - Crazy Dave sings but doesn't impress the judges this time around
 - Round One of the Hollywood rounds is recapped and the group songs are previewed
 - Groups practice their songs. Some fight and some get along fine
 - Paris Bennett's group sings and she makes it through
 - Elliott Yamin's group auditions and he makes it through - along with Sway and Terrell Brittenum

Price is Right clip where a man has a shirt that says "Push" on it. When Bob Barker pushes it, his shirt plays the Price is Right theme music. The guy wins his game too
 
AI5 (cont)
 - Kevin Covais, Will Makar, and David Radford are in the same group and all make it through
 - Derrell Brittenum's group sings and he makes it through. However, he quits, mistakenly thinking that his brother had been cut. His error is realized and he contemplates going back and apologizing.
 - Mandisa's group sings and she moves on
 - Montage of people messing up the words to Sugar Pie Honeybunch
 - All female group is awful and they all go home
 - Brittenum twins apologize and the judges say they will think about whether to let Derrell back
 - A different all female group makes it through
 - Brenna's group sings Sugar Pie Honey Bunch and they all make it through
 - Brokenote Mountain skit about the 3 cowboy dudes
 - Brittenum twins allowed to stay in the competition
 - Cowboys perform but suck and are all sent home
 - Contestants are separated into 4 rooms but only 1 room is cut

(1:02:33)

AI5. Top 24 is formed as contestants are sent up via elevator to learn their fate from the judged
 - Many contestants are told no
 - A nervous Katharine McPhee is the first person to get a yes
 - Ace Young makes it through
 - Some more nos
 - Bobby Bennett makes it through
 - Mandisa makes it through and Simon apologizes for the comment he made about her weight
 - Nervous contestants work out the jitters
 - Lisa Tucker, David Radford, Sway Penala, and Brenna Gethers make it through
 - Chick who doesn't like Brenna is denied
 - Gedeon McKinney, Stevie Scott, and Ayla Brown make it through
 - Chris Daughtry gets stuck in the elevator but when he gets to the top he makes it through
 - Becky O'Donohue makes it through
 - One yes and one no to 2 chicks who come up
 - Bucky Covington, Patrick Hall, Kevin Covais, and Paris Bennett make it through
 - Brittenum twins arrested for fraud and have to drop our of the competition
 - Kellie Pickler and Taylor Hicks make it through
 - Final 2 chicks come in together and only one makes it through. It is Kinnik Sky.
 - Final 2 boys come in together and only one makes it through. It is Will Makar

(1:44:37)

AI5. First live performance show. The top 12 girls go first
 - Introduction stuff. Blah blah blah.
 - Mandisa sings Never by Heart and is good
 - Kellie Pickler sings How Far. Meh.
 - Becky O'Donohue sings Because The Night. Meh.
 - Ayla Brown sings Reflections. Meh.
 - Paris Bennett sings Midnight Train To Georgia and is good
 - Stevie Scott sings To Where You Are. Boring.
 - Brenna Gethers sings You Are The Sunshine Of My Life and sucks
 - Heather Cox sings When You Tell Me That You Love Me. Meh.
 - Melissa McGhee sings When The Lights Go Down. Meh. What's with all the suckage?
 - Lisa Tucker sings some song I've never heard before. Meh again.
 - Kinnik Sky sings some song I've never heard before and is meh. Seriously... wtf?
 - Katharine McPhee sings Can't Get You Out of My Heart. Meh but she sang it good. This episode was awful.

AI5. The Top 12 guys performance show.
 - Patrick Hall sings Come To My Window and is mediocre. In the background there is a crazy looking lady with too much collagen in her lips during the judge's comments. Wow. I had to make her the thumbnail for this episode.
 - David Radford sings Crazy Little Thing Called Love. It's entertaining but not a great vocal.
 - Bucky Covington sing Simple Man and is all right
 - Will Makar sings I Want You Back. Not a great vocal performance but it was entertaining.
 - Sway Penala sings a song called Reasons entirely in falsetto and is meh
 - Chris Daughtry sings Dead or Alive and is good. Yay finally a performance I really liked.
 - Kevin Covais sings One Bright Night or something like that and is just okay
 - Gedeon McKinney sings Shout and is decent
 - Elliott Yamin sings If You Really Love Me and is decent
 - Bobby Bennett sings Copacabana and isn't great. It is entertaining though. Seacrest gets on Simon's case for not offering constructive criticism
 - Ace Young sings Father Figure and is pretty good
 - Taylor Hicks sings Levon and is just okay 

(3:46:45) 

AI5. First results show. 2 guys and 2 gals are sent home
 - Group performance of Take It Easy
 - Becky has the lowest number of votes among the girls and is the first one sent home
 - Bobby has the lowest number of votes among the guys and is the second one sent home this episode
 - Stevie and Patrick sent home

Recap of AI5 Top 10 girls performance show. Apparently it sucked so bad I didn't even record the whole episode. Just the recap. Good choice because the first girl's show was terrible.


AI5 Top 10 boys performance show
 - Taylor - Easy. The judges unfairly criticize him and the song choice. I think it was good.
 - Elliott - Moody's Mood For Love. Solid performance.
 - Ace - If You're Not The One by Daniel Bedingfield. I liked it but Simon didn't.
 - Gedeon - A Change Is Gonna Come. It's decent. If I didn't like the song I probably would have been bored though.
 - Kevin - Heard It Through The Grapevine. Meh.
 - Sway - Overjoyed by Stevie Wonder. Dull and boring.
 - Will - Some dull boring ballad. Meh.
 - Bucky - Some countryish song that sounds like it's title might be Thunder Road. It's okay.
 - David - The Way You Look Tonight. I thought it was good, but the judges bash him.
 - Chris - Hemorrhage by Fuel. Great performance. He is clearly the best guy.

AI5 results show. 2 more guys and gals go home.
 - Group performance of Love The One You're With. Yikes, it is not good.
 - Carrie Underwood is interviewed and then she sings Jesus Take The Wheel
 - Seacrest recaps all of the girls performances and tells them who is in the bottom three
 - Brenna and Heather sent home
 - Seacrest recaps the guys performances and tells them who is in the bottom three
 - David and Sway sent home

(5:04:09)

AI5 Top 8 girls performance show
 - Paris - Conga. It's okay,
 - Lisa - Some boring ballad. Meh.
 - Melissa - What About Love. I thought this was good and her best performance.
 - Kinnik - She talks about chitlins and sings If I Ain't Got You. Meh.
 - Katharine - Think by Aretha Franklin. It's really good.
 - Ayla - Unwritten. I like it but the judges aren't too thrilled with it.
 - Mandisa - I'm Every Woman. Good job.
 - Kellie - I'm The Only One. I like it. Simon calls her a naughty little minx.

AI5 Top 8 boys performance show
 - Gedeon - When A Man Loves A Woman. Meh. He sings it well but doesn't do anything to change it up and it's boring.
 - Chris - Broken. Good but not great.
 - Kevin - Starry Starry Night. Boring.
 - Bucky - Some country song called Wave On Wave. Bleh.
 - Will - How Sweet It Is To Be Loved By You. Meh.
 - Taylor - He is interviewed in a bunny suit and then sings Takin' It To The Streets and is excellent
 - Elliott - Baby You're All That I Want. It's a boring song but he sings it alright. It is just okay.
 - Ace - High pitched boy band sounding song. Meh.
 
(5:59:54)

AI5 results show. The last one where 2 girls and 2 guys go home
 - Bo Bice is interviewed and sings the Real Thing. How many times is this now he has sung this song on one of these tapes? Seems like a lot.
 - Kinnik sent home
 - Will sent home
 - Ayla sent home. Seacrest and the judges console her and she sings one last time.
 - Gedeon sent home
 - Musical recap of the Idol journeys of the 4 booted players

AI5 Top 12 performance show. Stevie Wonder themed week. Ugh.
 - Ace - Do I Do. Meh. The judges don't like it either.
 - Kellie - Blame It On The Sun. Awful. After the song she comments that her eyelashes feel like tarantulas.
 - Elliott - He cries when he meets Stevie Wonder and then sings Knocks Me Off My Feet. It's okay.
 - Mandisa - Don't You Worry About A Thing. It's okay.
 - Bucky - Superstition. It's definitely the best performance so far. Simon comments on Bucky's "Jessica Simpson" hairstyle.
 - Melissa - Lately. Meh. I cut out most of the song.
 - Lisa - Signed, Sealed, Delivered. It was good.
 - Kevin - Part Time Lover. I actually kinda like this. I think it's his best performance.
 - Katharine - Until You Come Back to Me. Meh.
 - Taylor - Livin' For The City. Good job.
 - Paris - All I Do. Meh,
 - Chris - Higher Ground. It is good.

AI5 results show
 - All I Want Ford music video
 - Ace, Melissa, and Lisa all revealed to be in the bottom 3
 - Melissa goes home

(7:19:58)

AI5 Top 11 performance show. 50's music is the theme. Barry Manilow mentors.
 - Mandisa - I Don't Want To Hurt Anymore. Good singing but a boring song.
 - Bucky - Oh Boy. It's just okay,
 - Paris - Fever. It's all right.
 - Chris - I Walk The Line. This is pretty good.
 - Katharine - Come Rain Or Shine. It's okay.
 - Taylor - Not Fade Away. It's all right. It is one of my least favorite of his performances.
 - Lisa - Why Do Fools Fall In Love. Meh, It's too fast or something.
 - Kevin - When I Fall In Love. Boring.
 - Elliott - Some boring song. It's okay.
 - Kellie - Walking After Midnight. Best performance of the night.
 - Ace - In The Still Of The Night. Meh. I'm starting to dislike Ace.

(8:09:04)

AI5 results show
 - We Got The Beat Ford music video



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