The Lawnmower Man
Super Nintendo
Nostalgia Factor:
Growing up, the Lawnmower Man was a movie that I desperately wanted to like. I always thought that virtual reality was the future of gaming, and that this movie would be the gateway that popularized this brand-new technology. When I watched this film, all I was focused on was the VR and how great it looked. Did I care (or even notice) that this was actually a really terrible movie? No.
You can say the same thing about the video game adaptation of the film. I ended up renting this title for the Sega Genesis in 1994. I was so enamored by the virtual reality scenes and how hypnotic and beautiful they were that I didn’t even notice the game itself was a real piece of garbage. I played this game the entire weekend I had it. Despite the game offering a somewhat stiff challenge, I was able to complete it before sending it back. When all was said and done, I liked the game and I had a good time with it.
27 years have passed and I now find myself in the year 2021. Opportunity knocked for me to revisit this game, albeit the Super Nintendo version of it. Since my memories of the game were so positive, I jumped at the ability to play it again. Man oh man. Sometimes your memories can really lie to you. I did not enjoy this one bit. Read on for my full review.
Story:
This game loosely follows the events of the film, where a mentally handicapped man (Jobe) becomes an evil genius through virtual reality sessions. Jobe infiltrates the internet and tries to take over the world before his devilish plan is interrupted by James Bon- I mean Pierce Brosnan, I mean Pierce Brosnan’s character Dr. Angelo. The game takes the events of the film even further, as Dr. Angelo storms the sinister Shop’s headquarters and destroys their leader, Hank Schroeder – I mean Dean Norris. I mean his – yeah whatever. This game’s plot is pretty much inconsequential and completely forgettable. At least they tried.
This game loosely follows the events of the film, where a mentally handicapped man (Jobe) becomes an evil genius through virtual reality sessions. Jobe infiltrates the internet and tries to take over the world before his devilish plan is interrupted by James Bon- I mean Pierce Brosnan, I mean Pierce Brosnan’s character Dr. Angelo. The game takes the events of the film even further, as Dr. Angelo storms the sinister Shop’s headquarters and destroys their leader, Hank Schroeder – I mean Dean Norris. I mean his – yeah whatever. This game’s plot is pretty much inconsequential and completely forgettable. At least they tried.
Gameplay:
There are two main styles of play in this game – run and gun platforming action and 3D VR stages. Let’s start with the good and focus on the VR stages.
The VR stages look really nice, and I can see why my 12 year-old self would have fawned over them. In some of the VR missions, you control your character from the first person perspective, seeing only a pair of floating hands in front of you as you try to avoid obstacles and make it to the end of the stage unscathed. Touch or bump anything – and I mean ANYTHING, and you die and have to try it over again. Other VR stages involve shooting enemies with a cursor or controlling a racing pod as you zoom through an obstacle course. Objectively speaking, these segments of the game are the most enjoyable thing about the Lawnmower Man.
The reason I dislike this game so much is because of its 2D platforming stages, which comprise about 90% of the game. I don’t really know what they are trying to go for here. Maybe something like Contra? If so, they failed miserably. These stages are just SO uninspired and milquetoast that they completely wreck the entire game. They’re so bad. So generic. In these stages, you control some tiny little dude, firing your weapon ahead of you as run and jump your way through the game’s absurdly bland environments. Seriously, these segments of the game look like they were designed by one guy who threw them together in about 15 minutes. I guess I’ll rip on these stages more in the graphics section of this review. But the gameplay is just as bland as the game’s visuals!
There is nothing inspiring about this game’s 2D stages. Nothing at all. Hundreds of other games have tried something similar but with better results. I don’t know they managed to make something so boring, but it happened. You can collect weapon and suit power ups as you play, but you lose them if you get hit, which you will (a lot). Some of the weapon upgrades aren’t even really upgrades, as things like the homing laser take a ridiculously long time to kill your enemy. What kind of game is this where your default weapon is more powerful than one of the most high-powered weapons in the game?
Not only do some enemies take a long time to kill, they will often cheap shot you the second they appear on screen. Better have your finger on the duck or jump button at all times, as these enemies aren’t fucking around. Oftentimes I didn’t even know they were firing at me because the shots I was firing were obscuring or blocking the shots they were firing. It is tough enough to react as it is, especially when enemies duck and shoot. You have about a fraction of a second to respond, or you get hit. But to not even be able to see if your enemies are firing because your OWN FUCKING BULLETS are obscuring your field of vision is particularly fucked up.
Who thought this was a good idea?
There are two main styles of play in this game – run and gun platforming action and 3D VR stages. Let’s start with the good and focus on the VR stages.
The VR stages look really nice, and I can see why my 12 year-old self would have fawned over them. In some of the VR missions, you control your character from the first person perspective, seeing only a pair of floating hands in front of you as you try to avoid obstacles and make it to the end of the stage unscathed. Touch or bump anything – and I mean ANYTHING, and you die and have to try it over again. Other VR stages involve shooting enemies with a cursor or controlling a racing pod as you zoom through an obstacle course. Objectively speaking, these segments of the game are the most enjoyable thing about the Lawnmower Man.
The reason I dislike this game so much is because of its 2D platforming stages, which comprise about 90% of the game. I don’t really know what they are trying to go for here. Maybe something like Contra? If so, they failed miserably. These stages are just SO uninspired and milquetoast that they completely wreck the entire game. They’re so bad. So generic. In these stages, you control some tiny little dude, firing your weapon ahead of you as run and jump your way through the game’s absurdly bland environments. Seriously, these segments of the game look like they were designed by one guy who threw them together in about 15 minutes. I guess I’ll rip on these stages more in the graphics section of this review. But the gameplay is just as bland as the game’s visuals!
There is nothing inspiring about this game’s 2D stages. Nothing at all. Hundreds of other games have tried something similar but with better results. I don’t know they managed to make something so boring, but it happened. You can collect weapon and suit power ups as you play, but you lose them if you get hit, which you will (a lot). Some of the weapon upgrades aren’t even really upgrades, as things like the homing laser take a ridiculously long time to kill your enemy. What kind of game is this where your default weapon is more powerful than one of the most high-powered weapons in the game?
Not only do some enemies take a long time to kill, they will often cheap shot you the second they appear on screen. Better have your finger on the duck or jump button at all times, as these enemies aren’t fucking around. Oftentimes I didn’t even know they were firing at me because the shots I was firing were obscuring or blocking the shots they were firing. It is tough enough to react as it is, especially when enemies duck and shoot. You have about a fraction of a second to respond, or you get hit. But to not even be able to see if your enemies are firing because your OWN FUCKING BULLETS are obscuring your field of vision is particularly fucked up.
Who thought this was a good idea?
With only three lives and three continues, this game can be particularly challenging if you aren’t ready for it. I’m up for a challenge, but not in a game where you get “cheap deathed” as much as this one. Lose all your lives and continues and you have to start the whole game again from the beginning. Unless you are playing with an emulator or something with save states, be ready to play for a long time if you want to beat this one.
Graphics:
I’ve already said how bland this game’s 2D stages look, but I guess for posterity I’ll say it again. They look really bland!
The 3D VR stages however are a different story. You have to admit that for a video game released in 1993 or 1994 they really nailed these segments of the game. It is rare that you saw anything like this back in the 16 bit era. Even Star Fox was kind of clunky and primitive looking. These stages are not. They are sharp, colorful, and smooth to play. Hypnotic too. The racing pod stages actually made me dizzy when I was a kid!
I’ve already said how bland this game’s 2D stages look, but I guess for posterity I’ll say it again. They look really bland!
The 3D VR stages however are a different story. You have to admit that for a video game released in 1993 or 1994 they really nailed these segments of the game. It is rare that you saw anything like this back in the 16 bit era. Even Star Fox was kind of clunky and primitive looking. These stages are not. They are sharp, colorful, and smooth to play. Hypnotic too. The racing pod stages actually made me dizzy when I was a kid!
Sound:
I can’t remember any of the game’s music so I am just going to go out on a limb and say that it wasn’t very memorable. At the same time, it must not have been very bad either or I would have noticed. Same with the sound effects. Can’t remember any of them!
I can’t remember any of the game’s music so I am just going to go out on a limb and say that it wasn’t very memorable. At the same time, it must not have been very bad either or I would have noticed. Same with the sound effects. Can’t remember any of them!
Overall:
The 3D VR stages are not enough to keep this game from getting a poor review. The 2D platforming stages make up about 90% of the game and that is what you are going to be dealing with most of the time. Take away the VR stages and this immediately becomes one of the most boring and uninspired games I have ever played. Easily a game worthy of an F score.
The VR stages keep it afloat…. barely. Maybe nostalgia is talking a little bit too. That weekend in 1994 cooped up in my bedroom each night, playing this game till the sun came up and the birds started chirping. I remember that fondly. As much as I didn’t like this game playing through it again in the year 2021, I just can’t bring myself to give it a failing grade.
This is not a good game. The only reason to play it is to check out the VR stages. The platforming sections of the game are a complete abomination. Play this game at your own risk. Just don't say I didn't warn you.
The 3D VR stages are not enough to keep this game from getting a poor review. The 2D platforming stages make up about 90% of the game and that is what you are going to be dealing with most of the time. Take away the VR stages and this immediately becomes one of the most boring and uninspired games I have ever played. Easily a game worthy of an F score.
The VR stages keep it afloat…. barely. Maybe nostalgia is talking a little bit too. That weekend in 1994 cooped up in my bedroom each night, playing this game till the sun came up and the birds started chirping. I remember that fondly. As much as I didn’t like this game playing through it again in the year 2021, I just can’t bring myself to give it a failing grade.
This is not a good game. The only reason to play it is to check out the VR stages. The platforming sections of the game are a complete abomination. Play this game at your own risk. Just don't say I didn't warn you.
Final Score:
D-
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