Just one thing to keep in mind, this isn't necessarily a strict ranking of worst to best movies. I rank based on my viewing experience as I watched each movie. I will use Return of the Jedi as an example. It is one of my favorite movies ever made. But you will notice that it appears somewhere in the middle of my ranking. Not because I think that those other movies ahead of it are necessarily better movies, but because I have seen Return of the Jedi a million times and it doesn't quite hold the same magic for me as it used to. I can watch that movie on autopilot while doing multiple things at once. On the other hand, the movies that outrank it I am probably less familiar with. They likely kept me more riveted and got me more involved than Return of the Jedi. So you are going to possibly see some funny things here. Movies that are clearly inferior to other movies, but ahead of them on the ranking. So heads up! But that is my reasoning in case you were wondering. I use the same criteria every year, and I have no plans to ever change!
That being said, we shall begin. Remember, we are starting with the worst and working our way up to the best.
Tier One
Most Tier One movies fall into one of these categories:
- Simply didn't like the movie
- Got distracted during it and didn't pay it much attention (fell asleep, started playing on my phone, etc)
- I've seen the movie too many times and zoned out while watching it
- I don't remember squat about the movie
132. Salo: 120 Days of Sodom - Supposed to be one of the most disturbing movies of all time. Instead I found it boring, preachy, and insufferable. Sure there is some disturbing content, but I didn't find it outrageous enough to turn this into anything but a shit movie. F material.
131. The Salesman - I heard that this movie was a tearjerker but I found it incredibly dull and boring. I couldn't wait for it to end.
130. The Silenced - Recommended to me as being a really scary and interesting movie, but instead I found it too abstract and discombobulated to enjoy. I wanted to like it, but alas I did not.
129. Blue Ruin - I will have to give this movie another try sometime. It gets rave reviews but I was watching this and doing something else at the same time and I do not remember a single thing about this movie.
128. Cube 2: Hypercube - I like the other Cube movies but this one didn't make any sense at all to me. They just explained all the weird, impossible events going on with "well it's a hypercube" and that is it. At least the other Cubes made some kind of sense.
127. A Monster Calls - I was multi tasking while trying to watch this and I don't remember anything about the movie. It seemed like I would have liked it if I had actually paid attention.
126. Pete's Dragon - Ditto. Another multitasking and I don't remember anything movie.
125. Willow - I have seen Willow before and I am a big fan but you know the drill - I was multi tasking during this and missed half the movie.
124. Whitey: United States of America v James J. Bulger - I didn't know anything about Whitey Bulger but the movie Black Mass looked interesting to me. I thought I would watch this as a precursor to Black Mass, but I was so bored by it that I never even got around to watching the other movie.
123. Blair Witch - I like the Blair Witch Project and I enjoy how they try to tie this back in to the original film, but there are too many unexplained things going on here and I hate unexplained phenomena and loose ends. Also the movie is just not that good.
122. Loving - I thought this would be a heartfelt tearjerker but it felt a little too bland and safe for my tastes.
121. The Monster - I don't remember much about this other than that it is a mom and her daughter (I think) hiding in a car from a creature. Seems like a movie I would enjoy, but I think I nodded off in the middle of this and that affected my enjoyment of the film.
120. Futureworld - The original Westworld movie is good, cheesy fun but this was a huge step back in my mind.
119. No Country for Old Men - Seems like a movie I would like, but I have tried watching this movie multiple times over the course of my life and I have never liked it much. My 2017 viewing was no exception. There are things I enjoy about this movie, but I guess it is just not meant for me to truly enjoy it.
118. Alien: Covenant - This got decent reviews and I am sure it is a fine movie, but I just could not stay awake for it. I'll likely give this another shot in 2018.
117. Star Trek: Into Darkness - This is the third time I have seen this movie. Didn't like it the first time. Enjoyed it much more the second time. Now I go back to not liking it much again. I feel as if they really missed the mark on this one after the original Star Trek reboot movie was so darn good.
116. The Light Between Oceans - I wanted to like this but I got bored during the movie and started doing other things. Expect to see that a lot on this list. Also, I hate how the husband in this movie couldn't just keep his yap shut and that ended up leading to him getting caught. It was eye rollingly obnoxious and affected my enjoyment of the film.
115. Jason Goes to Hell - I am trying hard to remember something, ANYTHING from this movie and I am coming up blank. I don't recall actively disliking it though.
114. It Follows - I have seen this twice now, and I haven't liked it much either time. I like the concept and I admit there are good things about the film, but I don't like the ending. It leaves me feeling very unsatisfied.
113. Street Fighter - Admittedly this is not the greatest movie ever made but I have seen it in the past and know that it is good fun. Unfortunately it is yet another multitasking victim on this list as I didn't pay much attention to it this time around.
112. John Wick - I have always heard how bad-ass this movie is. It probably lives up to its reputation but *sigh* it is yet another victim of me multitasking while trying to watch a movie.
111. Doctor Strange - I tend to like almost all of the Marvel movies but this one missed the mark for me. It was weird and it didn't seem to make a whole lot of sense. I was struggling with staying awake and may have dozed off and missed some key scenes during it. I am going to give it another chance at some point before Infinity War. (update - I watched it in January of 2018 and I liked it much more the second time around. It likely won't be a top 50 film in my 2018 ranking, but its standing will improve)
110. Defiance - I had seen this once in the past and I remembered it being pretty good. But watching it now I was bored. The movie should have resonated on a more emotional level given its content but instead it came across as more of a macho action movie than anything else.
109. Police Academy 2 - I watched four Police Academy movies in 2017 and this one I enjoyed by far the least. I don't know why. I just didn't find it funny or its plot very interesting.
108. The Lost City of Z - I think if I was to give this another chance while knowing what to expect that I would like it a lot. But as it stands the movie had a hard time holding my attention. I expected one big cohesive adventure and I think all the time jumps took me out of the film a little bit.
107. Escape From New York - This is one of those movies that seemed like it would be a perfect fit for me. I really wanted to like it but for whatever reason it bored me and I ended up flipping through my phone for the movie's whole second half.
106. Beauty and the Beast (2017) - I am not a huge Beauty and the Beast fan but I was willing to give this a shot. It was okay. I didn't hate it. I did fall asleep for about 10 to 15 minutes at the end though, so it has that working against it.
105. Pearl Harbor - This isn't necessarily as bad as I had heard but it could have and should have been a lot shorter. It dragged and dragged on waaaaay too long. It was decent but I wouldn't go any farther than that. Kate Beckinsale is freaking hot in this though!
104. Friday the 13th (2009) - I mean, it is decent and doesn't deserve the horrible reviews it gets. But after watching all Friday the 13ths in a row before this I found it odd how Jason acted and I didn't like the liberties they took with the mythology of the series.
103. The Dark Tower - This is one of my favorite book series of all time and I must say that they completely butchered the adaptation. If you push the books aside however and look at it as its own thing, it is entertaining enough I guess
102. Freddy vs Jason - Good corny fun. Not a great movie by any means but at least it is somewhat enjoyable.
101. The Stand - For some reason I had an itch to go back and watch The Stand . I have seen this many many times before. At first I was really into it but after a while my attention started to wander. I've simply seen this far too many times in my life to really get too excited about it anymore.
100. Don't be a Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Juice in the Hood - For the first half hour-ish of this movie I thought it was hilarious and would end up ranking highly on my list. After a while though it started to get stale and morphed into a merely average comedy flick.
99. House of 1000 Corpses - I like certain things about this movie but as a whole there is something about it that just bugs me. It is decent but it is never going to be one of my favorites.
98. Star Wars: The Force Awakens - I do like this movie but for whatever reason it failed to grab my attention when I watched it in 2017 and I ended up, you guessed it, multitasking and not paying any attention to it at all.
97. Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest - Decent movie. I had a relatively good time with this. I don't think it flows as cohesively as the first Pirates movie but it is all right. Nothing to write home about though. Again, I think I started playing on my phone halfway through it.
96. Krampus - I watched this a few years ago and I was not a huge fan. My opinion has not changed. I like the concept but the movie takes too long to get going. Its resolution is not fulfilling at all. There are good things about the movie, but overall I am very meh towards it.
Tier Two
The mildly enjoyable
94. Armageddon - Normally I like this movie but for some reason it bugged me when I tried to watch it in 2017. It is too much yelling and running around cramped ships in space. They could have easily trimmed a half hour off of this movie. Plus I got drunk watching this and puked and I think that definitely soiled my memory of watching it this time around.
93. Police Academy 4 - This might be where the Police Academy movies officially fell off the rails. I thought 1 and 3 were pretty good. This one is better than 2, but not by much. The humor changed in this one and became a little too stupid for my tastes. I mean, the movies were always stupid but this one is in its own league. I haven't seen any movies past 4 yet, but I can imagine that the rest of them are like this one.
92. Hostel 2 - Too much setup and not enough gore and killing. It's an okay movie, but that is as far as I will go.
91. Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them - I expected to like this more than I did. I enjoy how characters that are only referenced in the original Harry Potter series are in the movie. I feel as if this is a little too childish for me though. I was bored through a lot of it. Great special effects though, including one scene in particular which I shan't spoil. Still, this could have been a lot better. Maybe I just expected too much.
90. Congo - A good fun movie that I like to watch every few years or so. I don't care what the critics say. I think I have seen it too many times though and it has lost a lot of the magic it used to carry for me.
89. The Red Turtle - A fun, unique, visually arresting little film. I liked it a lot when I watched it, but thinking back on it now I can barely remember anything about it.
88. 1922 - I enjoy the short story this is based on, but the film adaptation is just okay. It does many things right. I don't like the ending though. It feels like things just end abruptly without getting resolved. There is no real villain. No climax. Its weird. I kinda like it but kinda don't at the same time.
87. Death Note - I had heard that this movie was terrible, but that was coming from hardcore fans of the manga and anime. Since I am not familiar with either I came in with an open mind. It is decent. Good first half with a so-so second half. The twist at the end with how the main character manipulated the book to come out on top is clever. Everything else in the second half of this movie is convoluted and annoying.
86. Martyrs (2015) - I thought the original French version of Martyrs from 2008 was fantastic. Its 2015 English counterpart however is not as good. It is dumbed down and a lot less dark and sinister than the original. If I had seen this before the original, I may have liked it a lot more. But I didn't so I don't!
85. Phantoms - I liked the book. The movie adaptation is okay. It is a little out of date but it has its fun hokey 90's moments. There are worse ways to kill time than watching this. Don't expect anything life changing though.
84. Cannibal Holocaust - I only watched this because I had heard that it was brutal and violent, and that there was some controversy about how people thought the violence in the movie was real. They actually do kill some live animals on camera, but obviously the human killings are fake. I couldn't decide whether I liked this movie or thought it was dumb, though. I am somewhere in the middle.
83. The Devil's Rejects - I think this is much better than its predecessor, the House of 1000 Corpses. It feels more grounded and real. Plus it has a (pun intended) killer soundtrack. Ultimately though, when all is said and done it did not leave a huge lasting impression on me.
82. Unbreakable - I've always heard how this is one of M Night Shamalyan's best movies, but I don't know about that. It is a little slow for me. I prefer Sixth Sense, Signs, and the Village over this any day. I'll watch it again at some point though.
81. Split - I feel basically the same way about this as I do about Unbreakable. I always hear how this is so good. How great McAvoy is in this. I mean, it is okay. Maybe I expected too much. I will watch both of these again in 2018.
80. Return of the Jedi - I started watching all the Star Wars movies in order at the end of 2016. I wasn't able to sneak in Return of the Jedi before the end of the year, however. So I watched it right at the beginning of 2017. Great movie, obviously, but it falls victim to the "I've seen it waaaaaay too many times" syndrome. I had a fun time watching this, but it didn't come close to duplicating the wonder I used to feel when watching this as a kid.
79. Batman Returns - One of my favorites when I was a kid. Just like Return of the Jedi, the only mark against it is that I am so familiar with it, I get bored and start doing other things every time I watch it. It is not quite as extreme with this one though.
78. Star Trek Beyond - I actually watched this twice in 2017. The first time, I wasn't paying attention and missed most of the movie. What I did see, I didn't like much. It didn't feel like a real Star Trek movie to me. But I wanted to give it a second chance. I watched it a second time later on and while I still don't think it is terrific, I had a decent time with it. At least it is better than Star Trek: Into Darkness.
77. Avengers: Age of Ultron - I didn't like this the first time I saw it a few years back. I thought I would give it another shot in 2017. I did like it more this time around, but I still think it isn't as good as other Marvel movies out there. It is decent though.
76. The Hills Have Eyes (remake) - I remember seeing this back when it came out and being really disturbed by it. While I am somewhat immune to this kind of thing after seeing so many slasher movies since then, I still think it is a fun - if somewhat not too original movie.
75. Guardians of the Galaxy 2 - Not as good as the first Guardians. I miss big Groot. The main villain is not that interesting and I found the whole plot to be a bit mundane. Even the soundtrack isn't as good as the first movie. Good effects and some funny moments though. It was interesting but not amazing.
74. Gerald's Game - I like the book but it is not my favorite King novel of all time. I had heard this adaptation was supposed to be good. I thought it was just okay. There are too many scenes of Jessie talking to people who aren't there. It bored me a bit. I understand they had to stretch it out and I get that. The ending was great and I loved the gross out scene when she escaped her handcuffs. But the whole movie seemed like too much filler.
Tier Three
Fun times
73. Last House on the Left (remake) - I remember being really disturbed by this movie the first time I saw it back in 2009. Kinda like with the Hills Have Eyes, I am a little desensitized to this since I have seen the movie already and plus I have seen several movies like it since then. That said, this is still an effective movie and I like it a little more than Hills.
72. Jason X - I find the whole concept of this movie (Jason in space) hilarious. It's a silly but fun movie. I had a good time although admittedly it is not very memorable.
71. Captain Fantastic - Interesting story and great acting performances all around. Interesting is as far as I would go though. I don't even know if you can call it particularly too fun or enjoyable, but it was definitely a unique enough premise to keep me watching.
70. Mulholland Drive - I don't really understand what is going on in this movie. Usually I hate confusing things like this, but I at least had fun watching it and trying to put it together. And kudos to this film because it contains perhaps the single most scary scene I have ever seen in a movie before.
69. Hacksaw Ridge - You can't help but love Andrew Garfield in this movie. The pacifist who won't pick up a gun who enlists in the military not to fight but to heal people. The movie tells the brutal truth about war, but shows a human side to things as well. It is well made and I enjoyed it, but in terms of great war movies it doesn't quite crack my top 5.
68. Cube: Zero - After a couple of enigmatic Cube movies it was good to see a little bit of behind the scenes action with the cube and how it works. Clever tie in at the end to the original movie too.
67. Shrek - Everyone knows I am not big on kids movies, but I thought this was enjoyable. I like seeing all the fairy tale characters interacting. There is some good potty humor too. I liked it.
66. Waterworld - I understand that this is not a great movie and it hasn't necessarily aged well, but I like it. The action scenes are great. Yeah it is a little corny and outlandish but that is part of its charm. I had a fun time.
65. Misery - Classic Stephen King movie. Annie Wilkes is an all time favorite character of mine. I would put it higher on my list but I have seen it so many times now that the feeling of suspense and "OMG what is going to happen next??" isn't there for me anymore.
64. For the Love of Spock - I expected this Leonard Nimoy documentary to be a little boring but it turns out that I actually enjoyed it. I learned a lot of things I did not know before. Got to see a lot of interesting people interviewed. He had an interesting life.
63. Donnie Darko - Another movie where I don't really understand what is happening. I still think it is pretty fun and interesting though. This gets the nod over Mulholland Drive because I love the mood of the movie and I think it is a bit more interesting and thought provoking than the aforementioned film.
62. Deep Blue Sea - If you are ever in need of a fun, lighthearted action movie you can't go wrong with Deep Blue Sea. It is fast paced, funny, and never boring. And it has Samuel L Jackson getting eaten by a shark. How could it not be a good time?
61. Return of the Living Dead - This was always one of my favorite zombie flicks when I was a kid. I was on a hiatus from Walking Dead and decided to check this out to get my zombie fix. It did not disappoint. It would rank higher if only my stream of the movie wasn't constantly skipping and freezing. That wrecked my enjoyment of it a little bit.
60. The Punisher - I watched this after Daredevil season 2 but before Punisher season 1 on Netflix. I needed my Punisher fix! It is a fun movie. I expected it to be terrible but I had a good time. If you like somewhat hokey guns blazing revenge films you should enjoy this.
59. Get Out - This was an enjoyable movie but I think I bought a little too much into the hype. It was good, but I think I expected to be blown away. I was not. But I liked it though.
58. Mad Max: Fury Road - This movie is almost like a video game that you are simply watching rather than playing. Fun, fast paced, action packed, visually stunning. It is very good. I have watched it 3 times in the span of a year, however, so I need to cool my jets before I start not liking it anymore.
57. Halloween 2 - A worthy follow up to the original. This one is more action from the very get go. The hospital setting is pretty creepy. I don't know what it is but it is not quite as charming as the first movie, although I do think it is pretty darn close in quality.
56. Halloween - A classic you can almost never go wrong with. Great movie and one of my favorite slashers out there. My only knock on it, if you can even call it that, is that I have seen it a LOT and I don't necessarily enjoy it or get as thrilled by it as I used to.
55. A Serbian Film - I went through a few months span where I set out to watch as many disturbing movies as possible. This was on a lot of people's lists. While it certainly does have its disturbing moments, it wasn't as a whole as intense as I was hoping for. But I did like it.
54. The Untouchables - I thought this movie would be boring as I am not into the whole mobster thing. But I liked it a lot! Why doesn't it rank higher then? Because looking back I can't remember much of anything about the movie. I remember liking it but that is it.
53. Star Wars: The Last Jedi - Most people seem to love or hate this movie. I can't decide where I sit. Since it is so high on the list you may think love, but I am not so sure about that. The movie did a lot of things right and it is spectacular visually. But on the same side of things it has huge glaring flaws and I don't like the way a lot of the old school characters were handled. Rogue One and Force Awakens were better. But I will have to see this again before I pass my ultimate judgment on whether it is good or bad.
Tier Four
Okay, now we are getting to the good stuff
52, Police Academy 3 - This was definitely a step up after the disappointment of the second Police Academy movie. Not quite as good as the first, but then again, none of the sequels in the series are. Still pretty funny though, and it was nice to see the series get back on track after the second movie.
51. Passengers - The main character of this movie makes so many terrible decisions over the course of the film. You can't really tell if he is a good, honest guy who did the wrong thing for the right reasons, or if he is a terrible and selfish A-hole. I think that is what makes the movie interesting and in the end I wound up having sympathy for him. Debate away all you want, I thought this was a good movie. Nice special effects too. Good atmosphere created aboard the ship. The sci-fi nerd in me geeked out a bit.
50. After Porn Ends - I just put this on at home in the background while I played a game on my phone, expecting it to simply be background noise. Instead it actually turned out to be very interesting. I had to, uh, research a few of the women being interviewed after watching this.
49. Hush - I expected a standard home invasion movie like Strangers. But there is a big twist here - the person being stalked is deaf! This made things a little more intense. I have seen movies like this a million times and wanted to write it off, but the main character and her plight definitely kept me interested.
48. Hostel 3 - Probably my second favorite Hostel movie. It might even be the favorite. I like the characters and I like the whole setup. I thought the film was fun. My only complaint is that they don't show a lot of gore and torture, which is one of the main reasons I like the series. Almost all of the gross stuff happens off camera. Story is good though, probably the best pure story of the 3 Hostels.
47. The Imitation Game - I had read that this movie was excellent but for some reason I doubted that I would enjoy it. The previews looked a little dry and boring and I am not big into WWII stuff. However, I ended up liking it a lot. It is very historically interesting in addition to having great characters that you feel for.
46. The Founder - I thought a movie about the guy who created McDonald's (as we know it) would be dull but I actually ended up liking it. Even though the main character ends up being a major sleaze, the whole thing is very interesting to watch. You know I like a movie when I investigate it further after the film ends, and that is exactly what happened here.
45. Starship Troopers - One of my all time faves. I like to pop this movie in every few years or so. Almost always when I am drunk or under the influence of something. It never disappoints me. This is a familiar criticism if you have been reading this whole list, but it does not rank higher only because I have seen it an absurd number of times and it doesn't bring that same excitement level to me when I watch it as it used to when I was a teenager. Still though, I freaking love this movie.
44. Jackie Brown - This was probably the one Tarantino film out there that I was the least familiar with. I hadn't seen it AND I had no idea what it was even about. This is one of those films that is very interesting to watch, even though it is mainly conversation based and there is not always a lot of action going on. I wasn't sure if I would like it because the description on Netflix sounded a little dull, but I ended up enjoying it a lot.
43. Alien - You really can't go wrong with this movie. It is both one of the greatest sci-fi films of all time and one of the greatest horror films of all time. Lots of high-tension drama and a cast that feels real and very relateable.
42. Aliens - As if Alien wasn't good enough, its follow-up Aliens may be even better. It takes everything good about the first movie and ramps it up tenfold. I always thought Aliens was by far the superior movie, but watching them back to back in 2017, it is actually much closer than I initially thought. For now it gets the slightest of edges.
41. The Lego Batman Movie - I was pleasantly surprised by this. I liked the Lego Movie but this may be even better. It is loads of fun, awesome visually, and actually for a kids movie has a decent story. I loved seeing all the different Lego villains, even those that weren't necessarily from the Batman movies. Only knock on it is that for some reason I can't remember a lot of what happened during this movie. I think I was eating dinner at the same time and may have missed some things. Definitely worth a rewatch.
40. Logan - I had heard that the movie was excellent and it did not let me down. This is very different in tone than most super hero movies out there. It is very dark and gritty. Great characters though and a great story line. This film had me interested in everything going on and hanging on the edge of my seat. Only problem is that I fell asleep towards the end and don't remember much of what happens in the last 20 minutes or so. Even so it was still entertaining enough to rank at #40 for the year. I got to watch this again in 2018.
39. Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl - I had forgotten how fun this movie was. With the new Pirates movie coming out in 2017 I was going to watch all the old ones in order as a refresher before tackling the new one. Unfortunately they all go downhill after this and I never bothered watching past Pirates 2. I really like this one though.
38. Westworld - I watched this after binge watching season 1 of the show. While it definitely is VERY different from the TV series and might confuse some people, it is good in its own right. It is corny but it is a fun time. I couldn't help but fall for it!
37. Teen Wolf - Believe it or not, I had never seen this movie in its entirety until 2017. I thought it was really good. It has an interesting story, it is funny, and it is loaded with 1980's charm. And you are almost always destined to like the main character in a movie when he is played by Michael J Fox.
36. Mean Girls - At first glance, you wouldn't think that this movie would be something I would be interested in, but it is actually one of my favorite comedy films. It is the characters that make it go. The movie has heart in addition to being funny and entertaining.
35. Raiders of the Lost Ark - I didn't plan to watch this movie in 2017, but it was running in local theaters for a limited time. I couldn't pass up the chance to see it on the big screen, so my wife and I went out to see it immediately. And you know what? I enjoyed this much more on the big screen than I ever did at home. I always have enjoyed Indiana Jones but this time I liked it even more than usual.
34. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom - Same deal as with Raiders of the Lost Ark. This was in theaters for a limited time (the week after the first one) and I couldn't pass up the chance to go see it on the big screen. This movie has always been my favorite Indiana Jones film and nothing has happened to change my opinion on that. In fact, I may have even picked up on things I haven't in the past and that made me like it even more.
33. Manchester by the Sea - I kept going back and forth on whether this movie was boring or actually really good. I settled on really good especially once you finally get some back story on the main character and the events that have shaped him into the man he is today. The movie can be grim and depressing in parts but it also offers hope at the same time.
32. Finding Dory - This is a worthy follow up to Finding Nemo. Fun, fast paced, a lot of great characters. And it is on a much bigger scale too. Again, I am not too big on kids movies but I had a really fun time watching this.
31. Suicide Squad - I don't know why this movie got such bad reviews. I liked it a lot. I like the music and the way it is filmed. The cast is terrific. Each character has a background and I felt that I could relate to all of them. It may not be the deepest or the most logical movie out there, but it is good for what it is. A short fun thrill ride with crazy off the wall characters. Don't expect too much coming into this and you may be pleasantly surprised.
Tier Five
Great movies
30. Cube - I really like the concept of this movie. Take a bunch of strangers and throw them into a strange situation. In this case, a strange situation being the inside of a giant cube-shaped death trap. They have to work together to escape or die one by one. Good concept and the movie creates good atmosphere with a solid underlying sense of dread.
29. The Godfather II - I have heard for years and years how this is one of the best movies ever made. It is no doubt an excellent movie but I do prefer the original Godfather for some reason. There are too many characters to keep track of with difficult to remember names. Too many stories going on at the same time. It was a little difficult to follow at times. That said, it is a great movie.
28. Amanda Knox - I came in to this knowing nothing about the Amanda Knox case. I know that the case used to be a big deal on the news, but I never really followed the news during that time frame. The whole thing turned out to be very interesting though. It had me riveted from start to finish. I had to read up on the case after watching the movie because it had made me so curious.
27. The Craft - Yet another movie that many consider a classic but I had never seen before. I watched this in a hotel while on an anniversary trip with my wife back in October. I don't know why I was surprised that I liked it (because as far as I know everyone does) but I did. A great cast with great characters. There is humor and there is also a lot of comeuppance dished out to bad characters, which I like to see in movies. It definitely deserves the cult favorites status that it has earned.
26. Wonder Woman - I saw this movie in the theater when it first came out and I thought it was a ton of fun. Looking back, I don't remember a whole lot about the movie (just that I enjoyed it) so that will hurt its overall standing on this ranking. It is clearly the best of the DC movies, however, which have not been great. Wonder Woman is perfectly cast and for someone who knows nothing about the character, the movie did a good job explaining her origins and how she ties into the "world of mankind." I want more Wonder Woman!
25. Apocalypto - Low key one of my favorite movies of all time. It is a fascinating look into a "primitive" culture that we as Americans with smartphones and computers know nothing about. Turns out that they are more like us than we may realize. They joke, rib each other, play around, have a strong sense of family. The movie really builds up these characters as people, and that makes the emotional impact even stronger when all hell breaks loose and they find themselves running for their lives.
24. Cool Runnings - Believe it or not I had never seen this movie until 2017. I have heard a lot about it though, and it is every bit as good as I had heard. Really fun, great characters, and it actually made me laugh a few times which is hard for a movie to do. Yeah, I am a grim and humorless son of a bitch. Sue me!
23. My Girl - Classic movie that Dan had never seen before? Yup, this is another one. I always thought this movie was all about Macaulay Culkin, but he is actually a side character. The main character is the "My Girl", a feisty 11 year old named Vada. It is more of a coming of age story than a romance. It reminded me a bit of the Wonder Years but in movie form.
22. I Spit on Your Grave (2010) - This is not as good as the original from the 70s but I still enjoyed it. What can I say, I just love gory revenge thrillers like this. It is fast paced and a lot of fun. I thought a lot of the elaborate traps were a bit far-fetched and that took me out of it a little bit in the second half of the film. And while the subject material is haunting, I did not find it as disturbing and unsettling as it was in the first movie.
21. The Dark Knight - I have seen this many times and I have always felt that this movie is overhyped. I gave it one more chance in 2017 and it turns out I liked it the most on this watching than on any of my previous watchings. It can be a little slow in parts, especially at the beginning, you can't just half-watch and expect to enjoy it or fully understand what is going on. I think I fell victim to that on my earlier watchings. But I paid close attention this time and picked up on a lot of things I had never noticed before. I liked it a ton this time around, even though I do feel it is perhaps a bit overhyped.
20. Money Train - I remember hearing about this movie being controversial when I was a kid. Apparently the villain who doused his victims in gasoline before lighting them on fire had inspired real life crimes of a similar nature. That piqued my interest as a kid, but for some reason I never got around to watching this movie. 20 some years later I finally stumbled across this online and immediately knew that now was the perfect time to watch it. I thought that this movie was a ton of fun. It is a good buddy action/comedy. Woody Harrelson and Wesley Snipes play well off each other. They feel like real people and that makes it easier to become invested in the film. My only complaint is that a large majority of the movie is just about these guys and their relationship. The actual robbing of the money train doesn't come until the last 20 minutes or so of the movie.
19. Point Break (1991) - This was recommended to me by a friend at work. I had never seen the movie before despite knowing it by name. It was a great recommendation because I thought the movie was a blast. I liked the actors in this movie and all the fun characters they played. High flying stunts, classic 80s (or is this an early 90s movie?) charm. I am a big fan. I was going to watch the remake but then I heard that it sucks. Boo!
18. Ex Machina - The concept of this movie has always intrigued me. I have a thing for the whole AI becoming sentient story line. I gave Ex Machina a shot in 2017 and it was every bit engrossing as I thought it would be. I found Ava to be a very intriguing character. At first I was put off by the whole human face on a robot body thing, but by the end of the movie I couldn't help but feel for her. I was oddly attracted to her as well. The ending let me down a bit though. I truly expected better from her!
17. Arrival - I had heard so many good things about this movie that I had to watch it twice last year. The first time I watched it, I thought it was okay but I wasn't falling out of my seat over it. So I had to give it another go. While I did like it more the second time around, I still felt that the movie was a bit over hyped. I do like it though. The acting, the effects, the sense of unsettling wonder that the film's aliens bring. It even made me cry towards the end too. Outstanding movie, but I just happened to like other things I watched in 2017 more.
16. I Spit on Your Grave 2 - I enjoyed this more than the first I Spit on Your Grave Remake. It is a new original story. I am a fan of the main character as well as the setting. Being set in a foreign country where this kind of thing seems normal makes it even more terrifying, especially when you can't even trust the police. I liked a lot of the revenge scenarios too, especially the uh, gross open wound infection one.
15. Star Trek - While I have mixed feelings about Star Trek's two sequels, I don't hold that against this movie at all. This movie is so much fun. It is fast paced, action packed, and it has great special effects. The characters will never be as beloved as they were on the Original Series back in the 60's, but I feel that they cast this film well. I felt a connection with everyone aboard the Enterprise. This is how reboots should be done! Let's just forget about its two follow up films.
14. The Girl on the Train - One of those extremely rare instances where I may have actually liked the movie more than the book. I read the book and it didn't stick with me. I thought it was ok. The movie was different. It really did a terrific job at keeping you guessing so the end result wasn't too predictable. It kept me on the edge of my seat. Considering I only thought the book was just all right, this was pretty darn good.
13. Moonlight - One of those weird movies where not a lot really happens, but it is still entertaining. I thought it was excellent. This movie is similar to Boyhood in the sense that it follows a young man through 3 different stages of his life and illustrates how his past experiences has shaped him in to the man he is today. You know a movie is good when it is just about the ups and downs of life and is still riveting.
12. Police Academy - I have always liked the Police Academy movies but the original was one of the few that I couldn't remember clearly. Watching it again, I actually find it to be the best of the series. Well, I stopped the series before watching 5, but of the first 4 it is the best. Great crass humor and a big, iconic cast of characters. There is never a dull moment to be found here. I would say it is a classic but that is probably a stretch. It is a classic to me!
11. Gravity - A movie I watched several years ago that completely underwhelmed me. I think that knowing what to expect this time around made me appreciate it much more. Visually the movie is brilliant. The action scenes are all extremely well done. The movie is fast, intense, and it really kept me on the edge of my seat waiting to see what would happen next. The whole thing has this claustrophobic feel that I have never quite felt in a movie before. I liked this a ton!
Tier Six
The top ten
10. Sausage Party - This was a throwaway movie that I played on Netflix one night because I had nothing better to do. I didn't expect much out of it. Holy crap, I ended up loving it! I am not a huge comedy person but the dark comedy in this movie is right up my alley. I think it is exceedingly clever too with all the grocery store items coming to life when no one is around. The concept has been seen in other movies like Toy Story, but this takes it to a whole new level. It must be seen to be believed.
9. The Godfather - I saw this movie back in high school, but I don't think I had any idea what was going on or what I was even watching. To me it was overly long and a bit boring. Watching it as an adult, however, I find the movie to be great. The cast is what makes the movie go. You just want to jump into this world and know everything there is to know about it and its characters. It could have explained a few things better (there were a few points where it jumped around and I was like WAIT what is going on?) but I googled a plot synopsis and was able to follow along pretty easily. I think all the Italian names and not knowing how everyone was connected confused me. This movie really got me wanting to read the books for even more Godfather-y goodness.
8. It - I like the old 90's miniseries but even I could admit that it was a bit aged and that it should have been rebooted. I thought this was terrific. I feel as if the Loser's Club was very well cast, and I found the kids to all be likable people you wanted to cheer for. Focusing the entire movie on the kids seems like a good move rather than jumping back and forth between time periods. Especially considering that you only have so much time and so much book material to work with. It made the movie feel cohesive and it did a great job at setting up its sequel to the viewers. I don't know if the movie is as good as its ranking, or if simply I am so used to seeing crappy Stephen King movies that it made this one seem so amazing in comparison. But hey here It is!
7. Star Wars: Rogue One - I first saw Rogue One back in December of 2016. I don't remember where it placed on my 2016 ranking, but I can recall thinking that it was only an okay ranking. I decided to give it a shot again in 2017. As you can see by its high ranking, I liked it a lot more the second time around. The whole story line is a lot more clever and interesting than I had initially given it credit for. Unpopular opinion but I liked the characters. Knowing in advance that they are all going to die made me look at the movie and their heroic actions in a new light. I thought the whole thing was very riveting and intense from start to finish. I think I like this even more than the first two films of the Force Awakens trilogy.
6. Caddyshack - Can you believe I made it to 35 years of age without ever seeing Caddyshack? Well, it happened. I have heard a lot about this movie and it did not let me down. It is one of the most genuinely funny movies I have ever seen. Not only is it funny, but it has a great cast of characters that you legitimately are interested in. After watching this I could not believe that it had taken me so long to see it. There is a reason this movie is such a classic in the comedy world - because it is freaking awesome!
5. Don't Breathe - I had heard a lot about this movie and Get Out last year. While the latter got more of the critical acclaim, I found this movie to be MUCH better. It is one of the best and most original new horror/thrillers I have seen in a long time. What starts out as a simple home invasion gets turned completely on its head and the criminals suddenly find themselves the heroes. I was on the edge of my seat as I watched and I was kind of bummed when it ended. I need to watch this again!
4. Spider-Man Homecoming - This has got to be in my top 3 favorite Marvel movies of all time. I had heard it was good before I started watching it, but even with high expectations it still managed to surprise me. It is the perfect blend of action, suspense, humor, and a great story line. It is not just another boring Spider Man origin story, which we have seen a countless number of times before. Spider Man is already an established character, and this is him juggling his life between being a superhero and a high school student. So it is almost like 2 (really good) movies in one - a high school movie and a superhero movie. Michael Keaton is a fantastic villain too. If you are only a casual Marvel fan or you don't like superhero movies much, you will still probably enjoy this.
The Top Tier
Usually movies that finish at the top of my ranking are movies that elicit strong emotional reactions from me. I'm not an emotional guy, but if a movie manages to successfully gut punch me right in the feels it is going to stick with me and I am going to remember it fondly. All of the movies in my top three this year threw emotional punches in my direction.
Unlike past winners (Titanic, The Green Mile, The Fault in Our Stars, etc and yes I am a giant sap and I don't deny it) these movies are not tearjerkers. In fact, they are all very disturbing and unsettling films. I googled a list of most disturbing films of all time and all three of these movies were on assorted bloggers' lists. All three movies pack big emotional punches and will leave you feeling defeated and drained after you watch them. Not exactly uplifting stuff, but they were heavy enough to move me in ways that other movies I watched in 2017 could not. Without further ado, here is the top three.
3. I Spit on Your Grave (1978) - This movie is indeed very disturbing. It is about a woman out on her own at a remote cabin while working on her writing. She catches the attention of a local band of goons and they proceed to harass, torment, and do awful things to her. The movie is very intense and will make you feel extremely uncomfortable. I think that is the point. Rarely do you feel a sense of dread in a film like you feel in this one. Not only during the initial attack, but afterwards when they keep letting her think she is going to get away but then jumping out and capturing her again. It makes the revenge (which is great BTW) so much more sweet. I liked this more than its remake (which came in at #22) because it felt more real and personal. It jarred me and took me out of my comfort zone in a way that most movies can rarely accomplish. This movie is not for the faint hearted.
2. Martyrs (2008) - And neither is this one. I had no idea what I was in for with this movie, but Martyrs ended up blowing me away. I have seen disturbing movies before but this took things to a whole new level. It is remarkably grim. Not only is it grim and disturbing (which I oddly enjoy) but the story is very good too. I became attached to the two main characters, which no doubt made the whole second half of the movie much more devastating than it would have been with a couple people we knew nothing about. I would recommend this movie to anyone, but be aware that its US remake is watered down and nowhere near as good as the original. But this version = brilliant.
1. Irreversible - Funny that my top 2 are both foreign language films loaded with terrifying and disturbing content. Right from the get go, this movie lets you know that it is not to be messed with. There is a shockingly brutal revenge killing in the first few minutes of the movie where someone gets his face smashed in with a fire extinguisher. The movie never really lets up after that. The film is very intense, like crazy, frantic intense. It is a whirlwind and I can't say I have ever experienced anything like this before. At first as you are watching you may be confused as to what is going on, but it shortly becomes clear that the whole thing is being told backwards scene by scene (like Memento). It starts with the revenge killing, and moves backwards as to the WHY this killing happened. The movie's most infamous scene takes place in the middle of the film. Be warned that is one of the most horrific rape scenes you will ever see in a movie and is one of the top reasons this is on so many disturbing lists. It is tough to watch, but brutally effective and unflinching at the same time.
Brutal content aside, as a movie it is very well made and top of the line. Well filmed, lots of twists and turns, uneasy but fascinating foreshadowing. Irreversible is intense and involving from start to finish. It left me with my jaw hanging to the ground. This the best movie I watched all year, and you probably have not seen it. Be warned. This movie is absolutely not for everyone. In fact, a lot of you may think I am a crazy freak for liking it so much. But hey, we all knew that already, didn't we?
