Friday, June 27, 2025

VHS Tape #20: This Tape is the Bomb, Dawg



The title of this tape was inspired by Randy Jackson. Hell yeah.

(00:00:00)

American Idol 4 Top 10 episode. 90's theme. This episode has commercials because I had to tape it when I wasn't home.
 - Bo Bice: Remedy
 - Jessica Sierra: Some lame country song
 - Anwar Robinson: I Believe I Can Fly
 - Nadia Turner: I'm The Only One
 - Constantine Maroulis: I Can't Make You Love Me
 - Nikko Smith: Some R&B song that I don't know
 - Anthony Fedorov: Some song I don't know that sounds like everything else he sings
 - Carrie Underwood: Independence Day
 - Scott Savol: Another song I don't know. It's not good... his falsetto cracks a lot
 - Vonzell Solomon: I Have Nothing

AI4 results show. Thunderstorm warnings!
 - Cheesy group song
 - Ford music commercial where there are Muppets made to look like the contestants, and they rap
 - Jessica, Anwar, and Nadia in the bottom 3. Jessica goes. Oh well... she will always have her sex tape.
 
(1:14:05)

South Park. Mr Mackey passes marijuana around in classroom so the kids can smell it, and Mr Garrison steals it. He loses his job as a result, and becomes a drifter where he gets drunk and tries all kinds of illegal substances. Ike is scheduled to get circumsized, and the kids think that means they are going to chop off his weiner, and try to hide him away. Garrison goes to rehab and comes back sober. When the boys find out what circumcision really is, they all want one.

CNN news clip about the Terri Schiavo case after the family decides to pull the plug.

MXC. Lumber vs Broadcast News
 - Slippery Slope of Slanted Death
 - Dash to Death
 - Wall Bangers
 - Pole Riders. Al Jazeera Babaganoosh in this segment.

Las Vegas Heat. This is a short lived COPS rip off
 - Mexicans in stolen car are arrested
 - Police investigate a murder and question a gay blonde haired man. He doesn't like the cops attitude.
 - Cop goes undercover and acts like a drunk Russian. A black guy steals money off him on the street and is arrested.
 - Cop walks in on two drunk white chicks relieving themselves in public but lets them go
 - Cops arrest a man who's arm is infected and hurting from shooting up so much. Hasn't he ever seen Requiem For A Dream? He is a suspect in the murder before.
 - Crazy old guy staggers around on the median of the Las Vegas strip carrying two beers. When the cop tells him to put them down, he chugs them. It's funny. He has a bag of women's clothes and when the cop asks him why he has it he says he likes to wear panties. The clothes were stolen. He cries and acts really funny when the cops pull beer cans out of his pants.
 - Murder investigation continued

(2:24:58)

AI4. Top 9. The theme is songs from musicals. Ick.
 - Scott: The Impossible Dream

Mad TV. Spoof of the show VIP. It's called TIT.

AI4 (cont)
 - Constantine - My Funny Valentine
 - Carrie - Hello, Young Lovers
 - Vonzell - People
 - Anthony - Climb Every Mountain
 - Nikko - One Hand, One Heart
 - Anwar - If Ever I Would Leave You
 - Bo - Corner of the Sky
 - Nadia - As Long As He Needs Me
 
Random episode of that Amazing Race season with Rob and Amber. I did not edit out the commercials. It's the African safari episode where Rob and Amber finish in first place and the two brothers, Greg and Brian are eliminated.

(4:01:49)

AI4 Elimination show
 - Fantasia sings
 - Ford music video - Everybody Got Their Something
 - Nikko is eliminated

MXC. Comic Books vs Hygeine
 - Sinkers and Floaters
 - Highballers. Zaghead Babaganoosh is in this segment.
 - Gang Plankers
 - Runaway Stump
 
South Park. Episode where Starvin Marvin finds a spaceship and is pursued by the government and missionaries. He picks up the South Park kids and they go to Marklar. Sally Struthers looks like Jabba the Hutt. There is lots of science fiction humor.

(4:54:03)

Some outrageous video show on Spike
 - Tourists in a car are surrounded by protesters who smash the windows. They have to floor it to get through the crowd and one guy tries to hang onto the car but is thrown off.
 - Kangaroo viciously attacks a mascot on the set of an Australian kids TV show
 
AI4. Top 8. Songs from the year of birth.
 - Nadia: When I Dream
 - Bo: Freebird
 - Anwar: I'll Never Love This Way Again
 - Anthony: Everytime You Go Away
 - Vonzell: Let's Hear It For The Boy
 - Scott: She's Gone
 - Carrie: Love Is A Battlefield
 - Constantine: Bohemian Rhapsody
 
(5:28:55)

AI4 results show
 - Contestants record When You Tell Me That You Love me in the studio and then perform it on stage
 - Cameras take us behind the scenes of the contestant's hectic lives while on the show
 - Ford music video: One Nation Under One Groove
 - Scott, Bo, and Nadia are in the bottom 3
 - Bo and Nadia revealed to be in the bottom 2
 - Nadia is eliminated, thank God. I was so scared Bo was going to go home.
 
Surreal Life clip where Adrianne comes onto Chris.


END OF TAPE





Posted by at No comments:

Video Game Review #578: Parasite Eve II

Parasite Eve II
PlayStation


Nostalgia Factor:

My memories of this game are hazy. I remember renting it when it first came out. This was back in the year 2000, when I was still a senior in high school. I played the game nonstop for one weekend, but I was never able to finish it. My main memory of the game involves getting stuck on a very difficult boss character, who you fight on a motel balcony. Other than that, I do not have any specific memories about the game. I vaguely recall that it seemed more like a Resident Evil game than the first Parasite Eve.

I haven't played this game since then. 25 years have now passed. Time to cross another one off my backlog! Parasite Eve II. Let's check it out, shall we?




Story:

This game takes place several years after the first game. You'll notice right away that it is a lot more different in tone. It is more action oriented and less about the scares. The setting has shifted from New York to Los Angeles. Aya is an FBI agent now. She works to monitor mitochondrial events and to take care of them when they arise as quickly as possible.

An attack at a shopping mall leads Aya to a remote desert town called Dryfield. It is there that a secret underground laboratory is discovered. Within the laboratory is an evil organization that is looking to manipulate the mitochondria to their will. They've cloned Aya, and named the clone Eve. Aya must rescue this girl, escape, and expose this nefarious plot to the unknowing public.




Gameplay:

You can't help but notice the similarities to Resident Evil when you start playing this. The tank controls, the graphics, the music, the setting, and the overall feel of the game are very RE-miniscent. Sure, the original Parasite Eve also shared some similarities to Resident Evil, but this is a whole different story. If the combat was more like Resident Evil (and less RPG-like), this could have easily passed for a game in the series.

The combat took a while for me to get used to, but once I did, it became second nature. You have a limited number of item slots on your equipped armor. You have to go in and equip these slots before you can use an item in battle. So you may have 5 potions in your inventory when you open the pause menu, but if you don't equip these potions to your armor, you won't be able to use them in battle. Same goes for weapons and ammo.

When a battle starts, you'll see the colors warp and the music change like when you enter a random battle in the first game. But these battles aren't random. You can see the enemies on the screen and try to avoid them if you can. Or you can lock onto them and catch them by surprise. Once the battle begins, you can run around the area and evade the enemy. You can attack when you need to, or use items or spells. There is a timer that makes you wait a tiny little bit, but this is far less turn-based than the original. I had to alter the controller configuration at first because the default button layout is a bit confusing. I made it more like Resident Evil, where the shoulder button draws your weapon and the action button fires. The way they have it set up originally is very weird. Like, the circle button locks onto an enemy and R2 fires. It's backwards from the way I know it. So yeah, I had to change that quick because it was messing me up.

You can run out of ammo in this game, but luckily there are ammo crates located regularly throughout the game where you can refill your inventory. You also encounter vendors that sell you new weapons, items, and ammunition. You can use money to buy new things and upgrade your equipment. I fell in love with the rocket launcher towards the end of the game. Fighting in battle earns you magic points that you can use to upgrade your parasite powers. I put most of my points into healing right away - because this can be a difficult game.

The boss battles are a highlight. I loved observing their patterns and formulating my strategies. They are bullet sponges, though. It happened to me a few times where I would run out of ammunition mid battle, and I'd have to let myself die so I could restart from my last save. I'd make sure to enter the battle with more ammunition and extra guns attached to my armor slots.

While the game is fun, I have to give its puzzles a little grief. I'm surprised I made it as far as I did when I was a kid. Some of these puzzles are so ridiculously obscure. There's an early puzzle where you need to enter a passcode to cross a bridge. I still don't know where I was supposed to find that pass code. I wandered the area for hours before I caved and decided to look for the password online. I don't know how the heck I found it when I was a kid. There's another puzzle later where you have to look at the ages of people in paintings, which are scattered all throughout a motel. You have to write the clues down, and there is also math involved in finding the right combination. Again: I have no idea how I figured this out as a kid. I ran to Google as an adult when it became clear I was stuck. I didn't have that luxury when I was younger.

I was able to beat the game, though, which is something I could never do as a kid. So yay for that. 

I had a pretty good time with the game, aside from the puzzles. I was pleasantly surprised by how well the original game held up after all this time, and I am doubly surprised by its sequel. It's really freaking good. Why doesn't this game get more attention?




Graphics:

The game looks great. It looks just like Resident Evil 2 or 3. If you're into that kind of visual style, you'll love this. Even the cutscenes are similar in quality.




Sound:

The game sounds as good as it looks. The music is not quite as catchy as it was in the original game, but it does its job. The enemies give audio clues that allow you to know when there is something in your area, even if you can't see it on screen. 

The game is not very scary, but there is one part of the game in particular (in Dryfield) when you hear a woman's scream over and over again in the background as you are looking around. It is a particularly agonizing scream. Definitely added a lot of anxiety to the playthrough as I was looking around and trying to figure out where it was coming from.




Overall:

Like I said before: how does this game not get more attention? I freaking loved it. It liked exploring, I liked the combat, I liked the graphics, I liked the atmosphere. I didn't like the puzzles. But for the most part, I had a great time. 

If you like Resident Evil, you should play this. If you liked the original Parasite Eve, you should play this. If you like RPGs or survival horror in general, you should play this. Who am I kidding? You need to play this regardless. 

I liked this more than the first Parasite Eve, but I gave that game an A. As much as I'd like to give this a higher score, I don't think it deserves an A+. So even though it is the superior game, it is going to get the same score as the original. That's just the way the cookie crumbles sometimes.

But yeah. Play this. I'm so glad I came back to finish this game off after all these years. In a way, I'm disappointed I didn't come back to it sooner. 



THE GRADE:
A


For a complete index of all my past posts and game reviews, click

Posted by at No comments:

Tuesday, June 17, 2025

Video Game Review #577: L.A. Noire



Before Playing:

I've known about L.A. Noire for a very long time. I never bothered to give it a shot because I didn't think it looked like something I would enjoy. I've never been into the whole "hard-boiled" old timey detective sort of thing. I've always found that genre to be kind of boring. Any time I am channel surfing, I skip over shows like that without even giving them a second thought. Heck, I don't even like the holodeck Star Trek episodes where Picard is cosplaying as Dixon Hill. They are boring. The whole thing just does not appeal to me for some reason.

Understandably, I held off on playing L.A. Noire for as long as I possibly could. I wasn't completely close-minded to playing it, though. I always figured I would play it "some day" because it gets such good reviews. I remember buying this from a used game store about four or five years ago because it was cheap. It's sat in my collection ever since.

Why did I finally decide to give it a chance here in 2025? My son pressured me into it. That's right, my five year old really, really wanted me to play L.A. Noire. He's been obsessed with my game collection lately, looking through my cases and discs and asking me "what's this? what's this?' over and over again. L.A. Noire was a title he had a particular interest in (probably because it has three discs). When it came time to decide on a new game to start up, this was an easy choice.

Before we dive in, I want to tell you all that I can't believe how old this game is. I still think of L.A. Noire as a relatively new game, but it actually came out in 2011. It's 14 years old. I swear, as I get older, my perception of time is becoming more and more distorted. 




Story:

I'll be sitting here all day if I recap the entire plot of this game, so I'll just give a brief rundown. You play as Cole Phelps. Cole is a street cop. As you play the game, Cole becomes famous in the police force for his crime solving skills. He starts to rise in the ranks. He becomes a detective. Then he moves onto homicide, vice, and eventually arson. Through a series of flashbacks, you learn about his time as a soldier in World War II.

Cole catches wind of a twisted crime scheme among various LA officials. He finds out some of his war buddies are involved. All the flashbacks tie together in the end. The game's climactic ending leads to a surprise twist. Well, not too surprising for anyone who has played the Read Dead games. Rockstar is not afraid to kill off a protagonist, that's for sure.

Although this is just the basic gist of the game's main story, there's still a lot I am glossing over. This is a game filled with mini stories. All the little crimes and mysteries you have to solve along the way. If you are a fan of the hard boiled detective story, you are probably going to love this.




Gameplay:

I was shocked to see how much this game resembled Grand Theft Auto. Like seriously: this could have been a GTA game set in the 1940s. The map, the driving, the game mechanics; it looks and feels just like a GTA game. The feeling doesn't go away when you get out on foot, either. The combat mechanics are very GTA-like as well. The controls, the aim mechanic: everything. 

The map is big and filled with hidden landmarks to view and cars to steal. The city of LA doesn't feel quite as busy as the cities in GTA games. There also is not as much senseless violence. People tend to dive out of the way right before you're about to run over them. Additionally, there is not as much to do. Collectibles, which include newspaper articles and cars to unlock, are sparse. I mainly just found myself tackling the main story missions. Every once in a while a street crime will become available to solve. These are basically sidequests that involve chasing a suspect (either on foot or in your car) or shooting them. Honestly, these missions are very quick and easy. And they all begin to feel like the same thing after a while. They are just so easy. They almost became a joke in my mind each time one would pop up. Luckily this is not the main focus of the game.

The main focus of the game is the crime solving. Normally, you arrive at the scene of a crime. You walk around and examine all clues. You check out the body and the surrounding area. You talk to witnesses and people at the crime scene. Often, you are given a nudge in the direction of where to go. The location of a person of interest will be written down in your journal. Follow it in order to reach your next destination. Often, you can search for clues in the vicinity of the person you are questioning. These clues help move the plot forward. They can serve as evidence and they often unlock new questions to ask from the suspects. 

When questioning a suspect, you need to watch their body language and find out if they are lying or not. It makes this crystal clear both on the box and in loading screens. To be honest with you: I never really figured this mechanic out. Oftentimes, someone would be looking down and away and I would think for sure they were lying, but they were not. Other people would look me straight in the eye and I would guess that they were being truthful but they were not. It often seemed to me that even playing by the game's own rules, it seemed like a 50/50 chance I was going to guess correctly. My percentage for correct guesses was probably very bad. Luckily the game does not punish you for making incorrect decisions while you are questioning a suspect. The story moves on regardless. It doesn't really matter if you are right or not. While this turned out to be a good thing for me, I couldn't help but shake the feeling that it felt a little cheap. What's the point of collecting all these clues, questioning all these people, and surveying all this evidence if it didn't even matter if you solved the crime or not?

I'd say there are about 20 to 25 "missions" in the game. Maybe more, maybe less. Each crime takes somewhere in the range of one or two hours to finish. Again: maybe more, maybe less for some. I found myself getting fatigued pretty quickly. I wasn't digging the story, which is probably a motivating force for some people. And the gameplay was boring. I lost count of the number of times I fell asleep while walking around a crime scene and collecting evidence.

I also got stuck all the time. A clue in the notebook would say "investigate the school." I'd go to the school, walk around for about 20 minutes (with nothing on my map and nothing in my notebook about what to do next), and I wouldn't be able to find anything. I nearly had to look online for help. I understand they want you to discover stuff yourselves, but come on. Just giving you this enormous area to explore, and then vaguely waving your hand and saying "here" just isn't enough for me. I think for this particular mission, I ended up finding clues in the trunk of a car that was parked in the parking lot. I only discovered this clue because it vibrated when I walked past. Nothing else indicated this is what I needed to do. Nothing on the map, nothing in my journal telling me too look at this car. And there are cars everywhere. How did they expect you to discover this aside from blind luck? And then at the end of the day, the evidence barely matters because it doesn't even matter if you are right or not when accusing the suspect of the crime. There are no consequences to being a crummy crime solver.

Another reason I became fatigued was because of the gameplay. The combat is a cheap copy of Grand Theft Auto. The driving, the targeting, everything. The street crime missions are almost all the same. Enemy runs. You chase. You catch. You fight. Every once in a while you'll get a straight up combat mission like fighting enemies who are holed up in a building. And then there is the golden "tail enemies in your vehicle" mission. Don't get too close, or you'll be spotted! Once you reach your destination, it turns into one of the two mission types above.

I understand why people would like this game, but honestly, I struggled from time to time.




Graphics:

At least the game looks good. The setting of 1940s Hollywood is pretty awesome. It seems very authentic. I was digging the vibe and the atmosphere the whole way through. I enjoyed the look of the black and white cutscenes that play when you pick up a newspaper - even if I did find them boring to watch.

I've read a little bit about this game, and apparently the face mapping they did with the actors was some kind of revolutionary thing back in 2011. It seems common now, as I've seen this technique used in many games. But if this was indeed a trailblazer back in 2011, I have to give it props for doing its thang and being so influential.




Sound:

The sound is probably the best thing about this game. This may be a first, coming from me. Usually I care about the sound the least. But while I may not have had a great time playing this game, I can at least recognize how awesome the sound is. The game is filled with all kinds of songs of the 40s on the radio. The characters talk like its the 40s. The presentation of the game is like the 40s. The chatter in the background when you are walking through the police station makes everything feel so busy and alive. Rockstar really nailed the look and feel of this type of game, I have to give them that.




Overall:

As you can tell, my thoughts on the game are mixed. I loved the presentation. The music and graphics are great. The 1940s atmosphere of the game is pulled off masterfully. Was the game actually fun to play? Debatable.

While I think my overall impressions of the game are positive, and this game will likely be getting an above average review score, I don't think this is a game I am ever going to play again. Like I said before, the whole hard-boiled detective gig really isn't my thing. Collecting clues and questioning suspects may be fun to some, but I was bored out of my mind half the time playing this. The characters are very wordy, and there is a lot of  time spent sitting around and watching. 

I actually think the GTA-like aspects of the game are the best things about it. Driving around the city, taking in the sights, answering the call when there is a street crime in progress. A lot of these are repetitive, and they can be pretty easy, but at least I was having fun when I was playing them. More fun than talking to people and looking at notes in a notebook. 

I'm a lot lower on this game than most people. Again, I think this is an above average game. I will be giving it a C+, which is above the Mendoza Line. But people online tend to really love this game. I'm more like: eh. I appreciate what its trying to do. It is just not for me. 


THE GRADE:
C+


For a complete index of all my past posts and game reviews, click


Posted by at No comments:

Wednesday, June 4, 2025

Video Game Review #576: Bug Too!

Bug Too!
Sega Saturn


Nostalgia Factor:

I was a big fan of the original Bug! for the Sega Saturn, and I played through it many times growing up. Its sequel, however, I have only played through one time in my life. The year was 1996. I had gone to Blockbuster Video to rent this for the weekend, when the lady checking me out decided to give me a hard time. I used to come to Blockbuster nearly every weekend and I would use my dad's card to check stuff out, because I was not old enough for a card of my own. No one ever gave me a problem, until I ran into this lady - who I think was a new employee because I did not recognize her. She refused to check the game out to me, and told me I needed to come back with my dad if I wanted to rent a game for the weekend.

I remember coming home on my bike and begging and pleading with my dad to come with me so I could rent this game. It was after seven o'clock, and he was already settled in for the night. He begrudgingly came with me, and after a whole bunch of hassle, Bug Too! was finally in my possession. In case you were wondering, that was the first and only time I ever encountered trouble renting a video game on my own. So I always associate Bug Too! with that b!tch from Blockbuster who wouldn't let me rent it without my dad.

I remember more about my experience renting the game than I do actually playing it. I remember I beat the game. I remember it being easier than its predecessor. I remember showing the ending to my mom because I thought it was funny. And that's all I remember. Fast forward 29 years into the future, to the year 2025. I haven't played this game since then. Ever since I learned to emulate, it has always been on the back of my mind that I need to come back and play Bug Too! again, since it will probably be near impossible to obtain a physical copy of my own. I know Saturn games are in high demand. They are hard to find and often too expensive to obtain. So emulate, I did. And here we are. 

How would I feel about this game in the year 2025? Let's dive in.




Story:

The Bug! series isn't exactly well known for its storyline. In this game, you play as the titular Bug as he looks to film six movies in one day. Each movie represents one of the game's worlds. There is a haunted house themed world, an Egyptian themed world, an outer space themed world, a circus world, an underwater/ice world, and a "trippy" world. Each one of them is named after a famous movie. For example, the horror themed world is titled "The Weevil Dead". Once you complete all six worlds, you beat the game and earn the Bugster a well-deserved vacation from movie making. A vacation 29 years long and running. This is the last Bug! game that was ever released.



 
Gameplay:

While this game looks and feels much like its predecessor, there are a few improvements to the gameplay. The most noticeable change is the addition of a run button. You can also hover briefly in mid-air if you hold down the jump button after jumping. Both of these additions make the game slightly more accessible than the original Bug!, which was brutally difficult - in part due to the basic controls.

For those who haven't played the original Bug!, this game is a platformer that gives the illusion of 3D. Not only can you walk left and right, you can take paths up and down, to parallel planes. There are multiple ways to get to the end of reach level. You aren't just stuck on a 2D track, making your way from point A to point B. The game always felt more like a giant maze. Branching paths, items to collect, different bonus stages to unlock. Bug Too! follows the formula of the first game faithfully. Aside from the small gameplay improvements, it feels a lot like the first game.

There are six worlds in the game. Each world contains about 3 or 4 stages. Some have more, some less. You can tackle the stages in any order. I just did them chronologically. When you've beaten all the stages, a boss fight becomes available. Beat the boss and you move onto the next world in the game.

At first, I thought that the game was not as hard as its predecessor. The first two worlds weren't too bad. And then: the space level happened. And then the water world. Really, any area that requires precision platforming or blind leaps of faith. It is very hard to line up jumps in the game. It's difficult to judge distances, especially when you are jumping up or down on the plane instead of left or right. This led to just an absolute ton of frustrating deaths. Checkpoints in the game are few and far between, and I often found myself having to replay large chunks of the level I had already played before. Very frustrating when you hit a section where you are dying over and over again, and you keep having to go back to the checkpoint. I played this time around with save states, as I did not want to see what happened if I ran out of lives or continues. Even with save states, I still struggled with the game. I can't imagine how I did this in one weekend as a teenager.

I ran into the same problem I encountered with the original Bug! The game becomes too frustrating. I often would find myself thinking: am I really having fun here? And oftentimes no, I was not. But other times I was really enjoying myself. I think it all boils down to the level design. Levels with bad design and constant cheap deaths: bad. Well-designed levels that are more fun to play and aren't looking to screw you over every two seconds: good.




Graphics:

It's a little rough around the edges, but I think the game looks great. It is very bright and vibrant. Each world's theme gives each of the stages a very unique feel. The stage design itself is awesome, with the moving platforms and the multiple branching paths. I liked the look and feel of the space world in particular. It just looks so freaking awesome. 

I'd say that this is one of my favorite looking Saturn games. Not necessarily the best looking, but my favorite looking. It reminds me of everything that was awesome growing up in the 32 bit era. 




Sound:

Bug Too! has a fabulous soundtrack. Right off the bat, the game hits you with a real banger. The Weevil Dead music is freaking awesome. You have to check it out. It perfectly encapsulates what you are going to get from this game: consistently fun and upbeat music that fits the theme of the stage. I was bopping and grooving my whole way through this game. The music is truly great. I love the callback to the original Bug! during the end credits as well. Good stuff. 

Sound effects are good too. The titular Bug throws out some goofy comments and one liners occasionally, but never gets annoying like Gex or other games from this era. I like all the small sounds, like when you pick up a gem or jump on the head of an enemy.




Overall:

Looking back at my review for the original Bug!, I can't believe I gave it a C-. All my memories of the game are positive. I would have thought it would have scored in the B range. I must have let the frustrating difficulty get to me. 

That did not happen here. I could easily see myself getting frustrated without the option of being able to use save states. But I played with them, and it greatly enhanced my experience. Without them, I might have been tempted to give this game a lower score, just like its predecessor. But you know what? I am going to do what I'm going to do to make the game more enjoyable for me.

As much as there were things I didn't like about this game and as much as I liked to nitpick some of its gameplay flaws, I still had a decent time with it. I still don't think it's necessarily a great title. In the grand scheme of things, it is a forgettable platformer that did not make much of a mark on gaming. You can skip over this and you won't really be missing out on anything. But at the same time, it is a very well-made game that is just oozing with charm. Great music, great level design, awesome graphics. There is a lot to appreciate here.



THE GRADE:
B-



For a complete index of all my past posts and game reviews, click


Posted by at No comments:

Sunday, June 1, 2025

2025 Things: May



2025 Things: April


5.1: Watched 1 episode of The Leftovers (2.10). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother Canada (11.03). Listened to 1 episode of Retro Blast (Memories: The Arcade at the Beach). Listened to 1 episode of Retronauts (Micro 32). Listened to 1 episode of Post Show Recaps: House of the Dragon (Rob and Josh Discuss the Season 1 Finale). Watched 1 episode of Starting Five (1.08). Watched 1 episode of Raised By Wolves (1.09). Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 210).

5.2: Watched 1 episode of Raised By Wolves (1.10). Listened to 1 episode of The Cartridge Club (CC Portable #14). Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (Addiction and Recovery In Stephen King's Work). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (48.10). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (9.26). 

5.3: Listened to 1 episode of Retro Blast (Resident Evil 4). Watched 2 episodes of The Amazing Race (15.06 and 15.07). Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Cinema (Random Movie Reviews: Body Chemistry II & Triloquist). Listened to 1 episode of Fantasy Football Happy Hour (5.1.25 ep). 

5.4: Watched movie: The Wolverine. Watched 1 episode of The Leftovers (3.01). Listened to 1 episode of Retrovaniacs (ep 17). Listened to 2 episodes of Serial Killers (Edmund Kemper Pts 1 and 2). Listened to 1 episode of The Retrograde (John Madden Football).

5.5: Watched 1 episode of The Last of Us (2.04). Watched 1 episode of Raised By Wolves (2.01). Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (Creepshow Turns 40 With Daniel Kraus). Listened to 1 episode of Staff Picks (Trilogy of Terror). Listened to 1 episode of Sega Saturn Shiro (Mainline Reboot ep 4). Listened to 1 episode of Post Show Recaps: House of the Dragon (HotD season 1 vs Rings of Power season 1). 

5.6: Watched movie: Trilogy of Terror. Listened to 2 episodes of Post Show Recaps: House of the Dragon (The Season 1 Throner Awards and HotD: 2022 in Review). Finished video game: Far Cry 4. Watched 2 episodes of The Amazing Race (15.08 and 15.09). Watched 1 episode of Starting Five (1.09). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (9.27). Watched 1 episode of Raised By Wolves (2.02). Listened to 1 episode of Retro Blast (Memories: A Kid and his N64).

5.7: Watched 1 episode of The Leftovers (3.02). Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (Intersection of Dark Tower and Dune). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother Canada (11.04). Watched 1 episode of The Amazing Race (15.10). 

5.8: Watched 2 episodes of Raised By Wolves (2.03 and 2.04). Watched 2 episodes of Batman: The Animated Series (4.02 and 4.03). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (9.28). Watched 1 episode of The Amazing Race (15.11). 

5.9: Watched 1 episode of The Leftovers (3.03). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (48.11). Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Gaming (Ep 51 Pt 2). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother Canada (11.05). Watched 1 episode of Starting Five (1.10).

5.10: Listened to 1 episode of Retronauts (ep 57). Listened to 1 episode of Fantasy Football Happy Hour (5.8.25 ep). Listened to 1 episode of the 7th Rule (ep 275). Watched 1 episode of Batman: The Animated Series (4.04). Watched 2 episodes of Big Brother Canada (11.06 and 11.07). Listened to 1 episode of Unsolved Mysteries (Update: The Girl with the S Tattoo). Listened to 1 episode of Sega Saturn Shiro (BONUS: PRGE 2023 Panel). Watched movie: Dawn of the Planet of the Apes. Watched 1 episode of Raised By Wolves (2.05).

5.11: Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Cinema (ep 49). Listened to 1 episode of Retro Blast (Castlevania Bloodlines). Listened to 3 episodes of The FF Dynasty (9.29, 9.30, and 9.31). Listened to 1 episode of Staff Picks (The Blair Witch Project). Watched 1 episode of The Leftovers (3.04). Listened to episode of the Stephen Kingcast (ep 234).

5.12: Watched movie: The Blair Witch Project. Watched 2 episodes of Raised By Wolves (2.06 and 2.07). Watched 1 episode of The Last of Us (2.05). Listened to 1 episode of The 7th Rule (ep 276). Listened to 1 episode of The Cabin (Wisconsin Folklore). Listened to 1 episode of Unsolved Mysteries (A Mother's Nightmare). Listened to 2 episodes of Retronauts (ep 60 and Micro 36). Listened to 1 episode of The Cartridge Club (CC Portable #15). Listened to 1 episode of the Retrograde (Mario Kart 64).

5.13: Watched 1 episode of Raised by Wolves (2.08). Watched 2 episodes of The Leftovers (3.05 and 3.06). Watched 1 episode of The Devil's Plan (2.01). Watched 2 episodes of Big Brother Canada (11.08 and 11.09). Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 211). Watched 1 episode of Home Improvement (1.15).

5.14: Watched 3 episodes of Big Brother Canada (11.10, 11.11, and 11.12). Listened to episode of the Stephen Kingcast (ep 244). Listened to 1 episode of Serial Killers (Lori and Chad Daybell). Watched 1 episode of The Leftovers (3.07). Watched 1 episode of The Devil's Plan (2.02).

5.15: Watched 1 episode of The Leftovers (3.08). Listened to 1 episode of The Cartridge Club (CC #60). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (9.32). Watched 1 episode of Batman: The Animated Series (4.05). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (48.12).

5.16: Watched 1 episode of Silo (1.01). Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Gaming (Game Launch Edition: Assassin's Creed Shadows). Watched movie: War for the Planet of the Apes. Listened to 1 episode of The Retrograde (Uniracers). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother Canada (11.13). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (40.00). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (9.33). Listened to 1 episode of Retronauts (Micro 34).

5.17: Listened to 1 episode of Fantasy Football Happy Hour (5.15.25 ep). Listened to 2 episodes of Retronauts (Micros 34 and 35). Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 212). Watched 2 episodes of The Challenge (40.01 and 40.02). Watched 1 episode of Silo (1.02). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother Canada (11.14). Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (10 Essential Stephen King Scores).

5.18: Watched 2 episodes of The Devil's Plan (2.03 and 2.04). Listened to 1 episode of The Retro Blast (Silent Hill 2). Watched movie: Creep. Listened to 1 episode of The Cartridge Club (CCExtra #10). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (9.34). Watched 1 episode of Batman: The Animated Series (4.06).

5.19: Listened to 1 episode of Staff Picks (Creep). Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 213). Watched 1 episode of The Last of Us (2.06). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (9.35).

5.20: Watched 1 episode of Silo (1.03). Listened to 2 episodes of Retronauts (ep 61 and Micro 37). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (40.03).

5.21: Watched 1 episode of Silo (1.04). Watched 2 episodes of Big Brother Canada (11.15 and 11.16). Listened to 1 episode of Retrovaniacs (ep 18). Watched 1 episode of Batman: The Animated Series (4.07). Finished video game: Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers. Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (40.04). Listened to 1 episode of The Retrograde (ep 159).

5.22: Watched 2 episodes of Silo (1.05 and 1.06). Listened to 1 episode of the Stephen Kingcast (ep 75). Watched 1 episode of Survivor (48.13). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (9.36).

5.23: Watched 1 episode of Silo (1.07). Listened to 1 episode of The Retro Blast (Super Mario World). Watched 1 episode of Batman: The Animated Series (4.08). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother Canada (11.17). Watched Untold: The Fall of Favre. Listened to 1 episode of Ear Biscuits (ep 55). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (40.05). Listened to 1 episode of Fantasy Football Happy Hour (5.22.25 ep).

 5.24: Listened to 1 episode of the Stephen Kingcast (ep 76). Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 214). Watched 3 episodes of Big Brother Canada (11.18, 11.19, and 11.20). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (40.06). Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Gaming (Game Launch: Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion Remastered). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (9.37).

5.25: Watched 2 episodes of Silo (1.08 and 1.09). Watched movie: Predator 2. Listened to 1 episode of Staff Picks (Star Wars The Phantom Menace). Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 215). Listened to 1 episode of The Cartridge Club (CC Portable #16). Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (Wizard and Glass). Listened to 1 episode of Worth it or Worthless (ep 9). Watched 1 episode of Batman: The Animated Series (4.09).

5.26: Watched 1 episode of Silo (1.10). Listened to 1 episode of The Retrograde (Joust 40th Anniversary). Watched 1 episode of Batman: The Animated Series (4.10). Watched 1 episode of Love, Death, and Robots (Can't Stop).

5.27: Watched 1 episode of Big Brother Canada (11.21). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (9.38). Listened to 1 episode of The Retro Blast (Majora's Mask). Watched 1 episode of Silo (2.01). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (40.07). Watched 1 episode of The Last of Us (2.07). Watched 1 episode of The Devil's Plan (2.05).

5.28: Watched movie (Creep 2). Watched 2 episodes of Big Brother Canada (11.22 and 11.23). Watched 1 episode of Silo (2.02). Listened to 1 episode of The Stephen Kingcast (Bonus - Witches and Wizardry). Listened to 1 episode of Retronauts (Micro 39). Listened to 1 episode of Arcade Attack (ep 216). Finished video game: Silent Hill 2.

5.29: Watched 2 episodes of Station Eleven (1.01 and 1.02). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (9.39). Watched 1 episode of Silo (2.03). Listened to 1 episode of Retrovaniacs (ep 19).

5.30: Listened to 1 episode of The Losers Club (F**k, Marry, Kill: Stephen King Edition). Watched movie: Incendies. Watched 1 episode of Batman: The Animated Series (4.11). Listened to 1 episode of The Retro Blast (MediEvil). Watched 1 episode of The Challenge (40.08). Listened to 1 episode of The FF Dynasty (9.40). Watched 1 episode of The Devil's Plan (2.06). Watched 1 episode of Big Brother Canada (11.24).

5.31: Listened to 1 episode of The Stephen Kingcast (ep 235). Listened to 1 episode of Post Show Recaps Yellowjackets (Season 2 Finale Recap). Listened to 1 episode of Collateral Cinema (Zack Snyder's Justice League). Watched 4 episodes of Big Brother Canada (11.25, 11.26, 11.27, and 11.28). Watched 1 episode of Station Eleven (1.03). 




26 episodes of Big Brother Canada watched
15 episodes of The FF Dynasty played
13 episodes of Silo watched
10 episodes of Retronauts played
10 episodes of Raised By Wolves watched
10 episodes of Batman: The Animated Series watched
9 episodes of The Leftovers watched
9 episodes of The Challenge watched
9 movies watched
8 episodes of The Retro Blast played
7 episodes of Arcade Attack played
6 episodes of The Losers Club played
6 episodes of The Amazing Race watched
6 episodes of The Stephen Kingcast played
6 episodes of The Devil's Plan watched



For a complete index of all my past posts and game reviews, click

Posted by at No comments:

Thursday, May 29, 2025

Re-Review #21: Silent Hill 2

Silent Hill 2
PlayStation 2


For my original review of Silent Hill 2, click 


I last played through Silent Hill 2 back in June of 2015 - nearly ten years ago to this date. I had a lot of great things to say about the game, praising the atmosphere, the graphics, the music, the pace, the setting, the gameplay, everything. But the thing I'll always remember the most about this game was how much it scared me shitless when I first played it. The eerie hiss of the radio. The dark hallways. The grimy decor. Pyramid Head standing in the hallway of the apartment, silent. Reaching my hand into that scary looking hole, while a terrifying mechanical banging sound repeated in the background. The grotesque hospital. The endless staircase. That never ending feeling of dread that accompanies you throughout the entire damn game. 

What did not resonate with me were the themes of the game. On the surface, this game's story does not make much sense. I always just chalked it up to the world of Silent Hill making its own rules, not being a real place on the planet Earth. I always pictured it as some kind of dream world or realm of the afterlife. So anything that happened there, no matter how nonsensical, did not really have much meaning other than to scare you. But I've listened to a few podcasts about this game recently, where greater themes like sexual repression, guilt, and depression were brought into the mix. How different things in the world symbolized different things in James psyche - like Maria's appearance and the sexy nurses representing how he wanted his wife to be. Instead, she was sick and withering away from cancer. 

I came into this playthrough of the game with an intent to keep my eyes open and really take notice of the deeper meaning of the game for the first time. I have to admit, though, it still the gameplay, still the atmosphere, still the scares of Silent Hill 2 that I will remember about the game. Not to say that I don't like the game's story. It's fine. But I wonder how people formulate these bizarre internet theories about what the events of the game represent. A lot of them seem like massive reaches. I know that a lot of people out there like things that are open to interpretation, but I am an "answers" guy. I'm dumb, so I need everything spelled out for me in big bold letters. I come away from this game thinking "okay, that didn't really make any sense." And that's it.

But I digress. Even ten years later, I still really like Silent Hill 2. I gave the game an A the first time around. I think if I remove the nostalgic feelings I have for the game, and I just look at it from a pure gameplay experience, it should not get an A again. It should be a little lower. It's a very fun game that had me addicted to it quickly. In fact, I completely set aside L.A. Noire, the other game I was playing, in favor of this. Now that I've beaten Silent Hill 2, I can return to playing that game again. But it says a lot that I liked Silent Hill 2 so much that it completely bumped a pretty good game off to the side for the time being. 

What's keeping this game from getting an A again? It's too easy. There is no real threat of dying. I finished the game with 20+ health items still in stock, and about 150 combined bullets across my three guns. I finished it in 6 hours, which is an hour less than my previous playthrough. A lot of the gameplay is just walking around in the dark, trying to open doors. There were times that I thought: "hmm, am I really having fun here?" The controls can be a bit clunky, especially when using the analog stick. For some reason, I found it much easier to use the d-pad for this game (which I played on original PS2 hardware). I also found it really hard to see things at times. I kept having to crank up the brightness. I understand the game is trying to be creepy, but it is no fun when you can't see what the hay you are doing.

So as you can see, this is not a perfect game. But I feel as if a lot of my complaints are nitpicks. This truly is a great game. It may not get an A, but it will only fall just a tiny notch. I can't wait to play the remake in the future. The only problem is that I do not have a PS5. Oh well. Maybe some day!


THE GRADE:
A-


For a complete index of all my past posts and game reviews, click

Posted by at No comments:

Wednesday, May 21, 2025

Video Game Review #575: Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers

Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers
Nintendo Entertainment System


Nostalgia Factor:

As a kid, my experience with Chip 'n Dale Rescue Rangers was probably similar to many kids across the USA. I rented it from Blockbuster. I played it. I beat it. I thought: "oh okay. That was a decent game." I took it back to Blockbuster. And then I moved on with my life and never played the game again. Honestly, I haven't given the game much thought since.

Over 30 years have now passed since I last played this game. I don't remember much aside from the fact that I know I played it and I know I beat it. I can vaguely recall the game being pretty short and pretty easy, but that's about all I remember about the game itself.

What I do remember about the game is that on the weekend I rented it, our family finally got a cat: Misty. That's my main memory regarding this game: I associate it with the day we got our cat. That's probably why I don't remember much about the game itself. It was overshadowed by a fairly large event taking place in the life of a ten year old. 

Since I have been having such a hard time remembering the game, I've been wanting to come back and play it again. I'm in between longer games at the moment, so I figured this would be a good chance to hop in and play through something short and quick. So that's what I did. 

And here is my review.




Story:

The events of the game play out like an episode of the cartoon series. Chip and Dale, along with help from their friends, go looking for a missing kitten. Turns out this was just a distraction. The evil Fat Cat (the villain from the show) sneaks away with Gadget while our heroes are distracted. Chip and Dale must then rescue Gadget. After doing do, she builds a rocket that our heroes use to access the final three levels. At the end of the game, you defeat Fat Cat and save the day.




Gameplay:

This is a fairly standard 2D platformer. Controlling one of the Rescue Rangers, you must progress through a series of stages, most of which end with a boss battle. You can run and jump but there is no attack button. The main mechanic of the game involves picking up items and throwing them. You'll notice things like boxes and apples all over the place. Pick these items up and throw them to damage your enemies. You can't jump on their heads and, like I said, there is no attack button. You want to beat an enemy? You've gotta throw something at 'em.

The platforming action is very straightforward. This game doesn't get too fancy with an extensive skill set. The most challenging thing you'll experience is jumping over some bottomless pits. In some of the later stages, there are environmental hazards like rushing water and rolling boulders to avoid. Simply throw a box at a switch to turn them off. 

Picking up boxes occasionally uncovers things like flowers and stars. After beating the game, I still don't understand the purpose of collecting these things. They didn't seem to do anything. They don't even contribute to a high score, as there is no points or scoring system in the game. The only items that seemed to do anything were the flashing acorns (which fill your health) and 1-ups. 

Boss battles are the highlight of the game for me. They are all pretty much the same (pick up an item on the ground and throw it at the boss repeatedly), but I still liked them. The enemies are fairly creative looking, and they all have their own unique attack patterns.

The game is fairly easy. That's probably why I don't remember playing it when I was a kid. There's little challenge to be found here. The game is generous with its health items, 1-ups, and continues. There is little danger of running out of lives. If you do happen to die, the game is not very long - so it should not take you long to catch up to where you left off. There are even a few skippable levels which you can avoid on the overhead map when you are deciding which level to play next. If you look at the map below, you can skip B and E entirely. I played them all for this review, but if I was pressed for time or if I had died and was looking to catch up to where I left off, I would have skipped over those extra levels entirely.




Graphics:

There's not really anything about this game that stands out graphically, aside from some of the boss battles. Fat Cat looks pretty awesome, to be honest with you. Chip and Dale look good, too. But everything else is "just okay." Very basic and uninspired. It's certainly not the worst looking NES game I've ever seen, but it is certainly not the best either. It is completely middle of the road to me.




Sound:

The 8-bit rendition of the Rescue Rangers theme song is pretty fun. Aside from that, there's not much to get excited about regarding this game's sound. The stage music can get repetitive. The "talking" noise you hear during cutscenes is painful to the ears.

Just like the game's graphics, its music and sound effects are pretty middle of the road, too.




Overall:

I'm glad I came back and played this game again. It's not great, but I didn't hate it either. It's a perfectly serviceable NES platformer. That said, if you aren't a Rescue Rangers fan and you don't really care about retro gaming, you will miss absolutely NOTHING if you choose to skip over this one. It's nowhere near as good as Ducktales or some of the other 80s/90s cartoon based video games. It's just very average.

This game does everything "okay." The graphics, the music, the gameplay, pretty much everything. I'm failing to think of one category where this game stands out from the crowd. No wonder I had such a hard time remembering it from when I was younger. That said, I still had fun playing it. I was leaning towards giving it a C because it is so average, but I think I'll go just a smidge higher than that, since it is so easy to pick up and play. The difference between this game earning a C+ instead of a C might be infinitesimal, but it is there. This is more enjoyable than a lot of games I've given a C before, so I think it deserves that distinction.

Will I ever come back to this game again? Hard to say. Probably not. But I know that if I do, I will be in store for a perfectly fun and enjoyable platformer that will keep me entertained for an hour or two. And I think that, coming from a game like this, that's really all you can ask for.


THE GRADE:
C+


For a complete index of all my past posts and game reviews, click


Posted by at No comments:

Friday, May 16, 2025

VHS Tape #19: Survivor All-Stars

 


The title of this stems from the fact that this tape was originally Survivor All Stars. I recorded over it when I found out that it was going to be released on DVD.

(00:00:00)

American Idol 4. Top 12 - Top 6 guys and girls combined. Mario Vazquez drops out and Nikko Smith comes back. The theme is music of the 60's.
 - Jessica Sierra: Shop Around
 - Anwar Robinson: A House Is Not A Home
 - Mikalah Gordon: Son Of A Preacher Man
 - Constantine Maroulis: You Make Me So Very Happy
 - Lindsay Cardinale: Knock On Wood
 - Anthony Fedorov: Breaking Up Is Hard To Do
 - Nadia Turner: You Don't Have To Say You Love Me
 - Bo Bice: Spinning Wheel
 - Vonzell Solomon: Anyone Who Had A Heart
 - Scott Savol: Ain't Too Proud To Beg
 - Carrie Underwood: When Will I Be Loved
 - Nikko Smith: I Want You Back

Bravo countdown of the scariest movies ever. Jaws is number 1. I beg to differ.

(00:36:43)

COPS
 - The police enter a house with a bunch of white trash rednecks. Some of them were smoking crack and get arrested.
 - Fat prostitute beat up by a Mexican

Mad TV clip where a few of the Mad TV guys come to the filming of the Top 12 episode of American Idol. They talk to some of the contestants including Bo Bice.

 AI4 Top 12 results show
 - Group performance of When You Tell Me That You Love Me
 - The Ford music video is some song I've never heard of before
 - Mikalah, Lindsay, and Jessica are the bottom 3, and Lindsay goes home

Jay Leno. This is a short clip where a lawyer listens wide eyed as Michael Jackson talks. 

(1:07:25)

Pat McCurdy concert on TV where he sings Our Song of Love and Sex and Beer, among other things. He also talks to the crowd as he usually does.

Some show on Spike with crazy things caught on video
 - High school hockey player gets naked after a big fight to ease the tension
 - Helicopter loses control and crashes at an air show
 
COPS
 - Police pull over two white people driving a stolen car. There is also a dog in the car. The guy tells the police he bought the car with drugs and didn't know it was stolen.
 - Another stolen vehicle pulled over. Black people drive away when the cop gets out of his car and approaches the vehicle. They are chased.
 
Bob Saget AFV
 - Sheet of ice slides off the top of building and comes down on some people
 - Mom falls down while helping little baby down a slide
 - Falsetto Animal Theater

Discovery Health special about disfigured people
 - Badly burned cop with a wife and kids. He comes back to work after his terrible accident.
 - Deformed boy has surgery to look more normal
 - Treacher Collins people interviewed

Clip from a VH1 show where they talk about the use of the song Sister Christian in the movie Boogie Nights

(1:52:12) 

Episode of Blind Date with Julie Berry from Survivor Vanuatu

AI4 Top 11. Billboard Hot 100's is the theme
 - Anthony: I Knew You Were Waiting For Me
 - Carrie: Alone
 - Scott: Against All Odds
 - Bo: Time In A Bottle
 
Mad TV skit about the Jerry Springer show. Jerry gets upset because people aren't fighting, and takes a hostage at gunpoint and says he will shoot if they don't start beating each other.

AI4 (cont)
 - Nikko: Incomplete
 - Vonzell: Best Of My Love
 - Constantine: I Think I Love You
 - Nadia: Time After Time
 - Mikalah: Love Will Lead You Back
 - Anwar: Ain't Nobody
 - Jessica: Total Eclipse Of The Heart

Clip from the news about the UWM bookstore being sold out of apparel as the team makes the Sweet 16.

AI4. This is the replay show after the numbers were messed up on the previous episode. All performances were shown again, but I did not record them - only the new judge critique.

(2:49:49)

COPS
 - Police come to a house where a woman is babysitting small children and they arrest a Mexican guy who has guns and drugs on him

Clip from Conan O'Brien where he is "interviewing" Barry Bonds about steroids. It's not really Barry Bonds, it is just a photograph with the mouth moving. At the end Sammy Sosa comes out, but the tape moves on.

Family Matters. Urkel is blamed for an explosion in a science class room. There is a trial and it is found that his blonde haired rival tried to frame him.

Step By Step. Frank and Carol find out that they aren't legally married. Frank dresses as a clown when the clown he had booked for his son's birthday cancels last minute. The wedding was supposed to be right after the party, so he has to get married as a clown.

Step By Step. Dana sneaks out to a seedy bar named Jakes to see one of her favorite singers perform. Frank, Cody, and Carol come to the rescue and beat up a bunch of biker thugs to save her.

(3:48:03) 

AI4 Results show (finally)
 - Cheesy group performance of He Ain't Heavy - He's My Brother
 - Ford Music video - Hey Now, You're A Rockstar
 - Mikalah Gordon booted

MXC. Mall Workers vs Telephone
 - Eat Shitake. Hey! This is my Facebook ID.
 - Circle Jerkers
 - In and Outhouse
 - Dope on a Rope. Tupac Babaganoosh goes in this segment and fails.
 
MXC. Art World vs Insurance
 - Sinkers and Floaters
 - Dead Endzone
 - Handjob
 - Wall Buggers. Chet Babaganoosh is the last one up, and fails.
 
COPS
 - Mexican guy arrested breaking into a roof of a store and stealing boxes out
 - Hysterical black lady named Sheri is stabbed multiple times by Mexican after he smoked crack. She freaks out and does not want to get in the ambulance and go to the hospital.
 - White trash chick is pulled over and lies about not having drugs. When drugs are found on her she gives a sob story.
 - Cop talks to a Mexican homeless looking guy who fishes crabs out of the ocean in Miami. The cop says he loves this guy.
 - Suicidal black man throws bricks at a Burger King window. When the cops come, he says he wanted to be arrested and gives a sob story about how his life sucks.
 - Prostitution stings where johns are arrested. Not much special here, except for a guy who offers only one dollar.
 - Car flipped on the side of a road and a woman is ejected through the windshield and is found on the ground in front of the car.

(5:09:42)

Ripley's Believe It or Not clip about a woman with no legs who uses a skateboard to get around. She is married and has a child. She also has enormous boobs. 

AFV
 - Man hit in the crotch with a board
 - Person runs full head of steam right into a snowman
 - Guy spins around on a baseball bat and runs into the side of a building
 - Boy does backflip on a pool table and smashes the light above him with his foot
 - Guys hook up some kind of electric shock thing to their arm pits and let the juice fly
 - People ski down a flight of stairs and fall
 - Funny dog clips, most of them are little dogs
 - Stuck In The Middle With You music montage
 - People in masks scare a sleeping boy, and his screaming reaction is shown in slo mo
 - Slo mo clip where a family is posing for a picture, and the tripod falls. The dad pushes off on his kids crotch and runs towards the camera to grab it.
 - Another slo mo clip where a guy falls through the roof of a shed, and is almost nailed in the crotch by a falling brick while he's on the ground.
 - Guy runs into power line trying to catch a ball
 - Cat freaks out and scrambled around in the bathroom at the threat of being washed
 - Person sleds down driveway in box and hits a pole
 - Man puts a bug on a girl sitting in a chair and she freaks out
 - Child hides under a curtain and only the butt and legs are visible from behind
 - Little girl runs off with entire pinata after it is knocked down and other kids chase after her
 - Clips with band members falling down on and off stage
 - Clip with guys whapping each other on the head with spoons
 - Little child keeps taking pictures of himself at Christmas with flash camera
 - Little boy in front of a trainers toilet tries to pee and keeps telling the pee to come on out
 - Kid covers his face in Maxi pads and looks like a mummy
 - Kid on one of those electric car things runs into a man, and then backs up over another kid
 - Clips of people sleeping. Some of them are awoken in scary fashion.
 - Dog is confused by no glass on the front door. It only will go out when door is opened, even though it can walk right out.
 - Little kid music montage
 - Kid gets excited over Christmas present and dances
 - Skunk opens gift
 - Orange cat hangs out in Christmas tree
 - Kid knocks over Christmas tree with electric car thing
 - Kid pukes while on Santa's lap
 - How many crotch hits until the turtle can make it through the door? 34
 - Kid scared by mask
 - Dog tries to get in crotch of person sitting cross legged
 - Dancing people smack heads
 - Kid falls at top of water slide
 - Batting cage guy hits foul ball into his crotch
 - Shaving cream sleeping gag played on Army guy
 - Couple on beach knocked over by big wave
 - Para sailor hits big wave but keeps going
 - Dog runs into person and knocks them over
 - Chick falls backward in lawn chair
 - Shark scares people at beach
 - Slo mo clip montage
 - Confused dog clip wins the grand prize. The people are from Wisconsin.

(5:43:43)

Bobby Jon on Early Show after losing fire making challenge on Survivor Palau

Discovery Health special with deformed people prepping for cosmetic surgery. There is a deformed woman named Haley, a boy named Julian (who looks like a freaky Harry Potter) and a baby who is not named.

Clips from some TLC show about people who act weird after getting pulled over for drunk driving. One person puts traffic cone on head, another does backflips. There is also a guy in assless chaps, and strippers who come out of the car naked.

Discovery Health special (cont). Julian goes in for surgery and has to wear a thing on his head which must be tightened daily that pulls his face forward. Haley applies for a job.

TLC special with stupid criminal behavior
 - Car that is pulled over on side of road gets hit by van
 - Semi hits a cop car on side of road and wipes out
 - Another semi hits a cop car
 - White guy in afro wig robs a store and no one takes him seriously. He asks customer on the way out for money and only gets one dollar. "I treat you nice, see?"
 - Robber grabs entire cash register and can't open it. He almost shocks himself.
 - Guy with knife tries to rob fried chicken joint and gets beat by the employees and they throw hot grease on him
 - Robber fires gun at cashier and can't get register open. He tells a customer in the store to open it, and he does. But he takes all the money for himself and the robber barely gets anything.

Discovery Health special (cont). Mother of deformed baby decides not to have surgery. The baby has a birthday party. Julian is shown post surgery. He looks better but he is still kinda ugly. The face was over corrected so that when he grows, he will grow into it. The mom doesn't like the new look. Post surgery Haley is still ugly, but gets a nanny job.

(6:25:33) 

Maury Povich episode about couples who are opposites.
 - Skinny black man with enormous black woman who is 20 years younger than him
 - Hot blonde 18 year old porn star named Holly with a really old man
 - Midget dates a tall black woman with enormous boobs
 - Business man dates a woman with giant fake 64MM boobs
 - Black man with 500 pound white woman
 - 20 year old hot black woman with 82 year old black man in pimp suit
 - Young hot white woman with 450 pound black man
 - Old white man with midget. They have been married 12 years.
 
Brief clip on the news about Cory Clark coming out with his affair with Paula Abdul while on American Idol

Maury (cont)
 - Conservative blonde woman with tattooed bald man with all kinds of piercings and modified implants

AFV
 - Man throws bowling ball and launches himself down the lane while the ball is stuck in his hand. This has to be rehearsed.
 - Boy jumps off diving board and hits his bottom on the edge of it
 - Crab latches onto a little boy's foot
 - Little kid kicks Lego board in half
 - Guy gets pie in face right before blowing candles out on cake
 - Tree swinging mishaps
 - Funny dog clips
 - Slow Ride music montage

Fear Factor clip where woman can't eat maggoty cheese


AFV (cont)
 - A couple of funny swinging clips
 - Man dragged around by kite
 - Fat man jumps on balloon in water and launches someone way up in the air
 - Two people skydive together. This is not funny at all. Why is it on the show?
 - Women who can't ride motorcycles vs kids who need to go potty during school pageants
 - Spaghetti eating clips. One guy puts spaghetti in his nose and sucks it into his mouth. Ew.
 - Guy kicked in crotch 3 times during gymnastics
 - Kid flushes toilet while sitting in it
 - A group of running kids falls down all over each other
 - Dog won't eat a treat that comes from the dog catcher. This clip goes on to win at the end.
 - Giant ball hits person who is working out
 - Ringbearer child throws pillow
 - ATV flips over going up hill
 - Cat chases mouse around yard
 - Dancing guys at wedding get knocked around
 - Baby twitches legs when tickled
 - Lion squirts pee at camera
 - Person pushes piano over on stage
 - Violin falls apart while being played
 - Child bashes away at piano keys
 - Candle holding girl falls at wedding
 - Alligator scared into water by group of birds
 - Dog with chattery jaw
 - Gerbil spins wheel in cage
 - Ugly birds swarm woman and go crazy eating out of a giant bowl and the woman is mortified
 - Guy gets stuck inside one of those red and yellow kid vehicles
 - Dog stuck in dog door
 - Kid stuck in shirt while pulling it off
 - Hole knocked in ceiling to pull cat out
 - People falling from ladders montage
 - Poodle growls and has bug eyes while being pet
 - Girl leans against fence by swimming pool and it falls backward
 - Cat licks self and touches genitals
 - Black girl lights afro on fire while blowing out birthday candles

 - Woman gets flipped off of a horse's back and into a fence
 - Kid breaks tape measure in pieces and tapes it back together in wrong order
 - Buffalo lays down in middle of volleyball court
 - Seal swims around stuck in a hoop
 - Dog attacks giant fake spider
 - Little chick can't make it up steps
 - Dog dives into bottom of pool and retrieves toy
 - Pug dog in bumblebee outfit walks around during Halloween and looks miserable
 - Black guy punches scarecrow that jumps up and scares him during trick or treat

*Simon Cowell presents Il Divo during the commercials*

AFV (cont)
 - Boy blows an enormous bubble, and then a bubble inside the bubble, and then a bubble inside that one!
 - The "Picky dog" clip wins

VH1 clip where people talk about Jennifer Lopez's ass. Gervase from Survivor is a fan.

Bob Saget version of AFV
 - Swimming pool mishaps
 - Kid shares ice cream with monkey
 - Kid runs over ice cream cone and picks it up and eats it
 - Golfing clips
 - Camera is set up to make it look like baby is climbing a wall
 - Guy wipes out on dirtbike
 - Scottish people in kilts fall while pushing a cart
 - Guy jumps on skateboard and falls
 - Lady falls off kid bike
 - Lady runs into branch on riding lawnmower and falls off

MXC. Aerospace vs Fast Food
 - Sno Man's Land
 - Frozen Wall Bangers
 - Sperm Wheelers
 - Frigid Slope of Icy Death. Heydoop Babaganoosh is first to go here, and doesn't score.

MXC. Unemployed vs Environmentalists
 - Wall Bangers
 - Finger It
 - Dope on a Rope
 - Irritable Bowl Syndrome
 - Pole Riders. Permeeth Babaganoosh is halfway through this segment and does not make it.


END OF TAPE

 

Posted by at No comments:
Subscribe to: Posts (Atom)