Tuesday, October 4, 2016

2016 Movie Ranking Countdown: September

I'm a few days late this month, but never fear: my movie ranking countdown is here. September is finally done and over with and it is time to take a look back at all ten movies I watched during the month. The five movies I had the best time with will move on to my ultimate year end ranking.

We'll start from the top.

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I am on the fence as to whether I actually enjoyed this movie or not. It kept me entertained, which is the main thing I am looking for in a movie. But I came into it knowing that there was some kind of a twist. And I think that me trying to figure out the twist the whole time I was watching this ruined it a little for me. Rather than just sit there and enjoy the movie, I thought about it too much. And thinking is never a good thing where I am concerned.

And then when the twist hit towards the end of the movie, I felt a little cheated. The identity of the killers I had suspected very early on in the film, but based on the actions of the characters I started to discount it. So then when my theory actually ended up being true, it felt a little underwhelming to me. Things didn't add up. I suppose some will say that it was a great twist, but I disagree. And when you take away the twist you are left with a somewhat average "danger on vacation" type movie that we've already seen hundreds of times before.

I mean, this was good. It kept me entertained. But I wasn't as enthralled by it as a lot of people I know were. Maybe I will watch again someday knowing the twist, and that will make the film a little bit more enjoyable for me.




I watched the original Darkman back in August and had a pretty good time with it as I recall. Its sequel, while made in the mold of the original and still a lot of fun, doesn't bring much new to the table. Same basic formula. Same basic plot. The whole movie is about Payton Westlake trying to take down Durant, who somehow miraculously survived a helicopter crash into a bridge and subsequent explosion in the previous film.

Payton uses his face changing technology to infiltrate Durant's group but not before hitting a few snags along the way. I did enjoy the movie but it felt a little too similar to the original to me. I do like Durant and I think he makes a great villain. But the whole movie had too much of a been there/done that feel for me. This will only make my top five for the month in the extreme case it gets tossed in because of lack of other options.




More of the same from the Darkman series. At least this one strays away from Durant and his organization.

Payton takes on a new villain, this time played by that dude from Lost who has the famous quote about not going to Guam. Again Payton uses his face changing technology to infiltrate the group and kill the bad guy. Apparently the Darkman series is a one trick pony.

Nothing too special about this movie. After two Darkman movies with very similar plots, I was really just kind of eager to get this one over with. I do have to give them props for at least trying something different, with the bad guy's wife and child getting close to Payton and becoming big sympathetic characters to root for. And Jeff Fahey does play a really good villain. I can't decide if I like this one or part 2 better. If it does come down to one of these two movies making my top five for the month, it will be a tough call.




I had high hopes for this movie. I love Batman: The Animated Series. And I had read that this was basically an extended episode of the show - except for mature audiences. Meaning there would be blood and death and stuff. Sounded great to me. Batman is meant to be dark and gritty and I thought that this would be an excellent match.

But it actually turned out to be a little boring for me. True, I have never read the graphic novel so I didn't really know what to expect. But the first half of the film focuses on some kind of creepy father/daughter relationship between Batman and Batgirl where they end up doing the nasty and then getting in a fight. The Joker isn't even in it at all.

Finally he does come in for the second half of the film. While he does wreak some havoc, I didn't think what was happening onscreen was as earth shattering as I had hoped. I thought this would be really gruesome and disturbing, but it seemed relatively mild to me. Perhaps I had my hopes too high. This was okay, I guess. Just not what I was expecting. Maybe if I watch it again someday knowing what to expect I will like it more. But as it stands, I was kind of bored with this.




I always really want to like this movie. Final Fantasy VII is one of my favorite games of all time, and when I originally heard that they were going to expand the story with a CGI movie I was ecstatic. But my problem is that the game was a very deep and emotional experience. The movie is not.

Its story is a very basic one where the bad guys are out to resurrect Sephiroth. That about sums it up. 90% of the film is fighting and wild action scenes. Sure the movie looks cool and the fighting is fun to look at. But it becomes tedious after a while. The movie is lacking the heart and soul of the game. So many of the game's memorable characters only make brief cameos in the movie. And all they do with their cameos is fight. There is no heart, there is no real personality to this movie.

I feel that it could have been a lot better. It does a lot of things right, especially from a technical aspect. But as far as delivering a fitting send off to one of the best games ever made, I think this falls way short.




I had never heard of this movie until seeing it at the library. But when I saw that it was an M. Night Shyamalan movie I immediately snatched it up. I've always had soft spot for good old M. Night, and will usually give anything he puts out a try.

The movie is about two kids who are shipped off to meet their grandparents (who are estranged from the kids' mother) for the first time. The grandparents are old, but they seem nice. But funny things start happening, especially at night. The grandparents' behavior becomes scary and erratic. And then you realize that this is an M. Night Shyamalan movie and that there has to be a twist coming. Which there is.

I found that I enjoyed this movie. The twist didn't seem too obvious to me. It was scary at parts. The movie flowed along at a fast pace and I was never bored - which is a problem for me with most films and my short attention span. I could have done without that annoying kid and his rapping, but it is what it is. All in all I enjoyed this movie, but if you ask me about it a year from now I will probably struggle to remember much about it. So it wasn't that great.




I came into this movie with no expectations. I had never heard of it before, but the description on Netflix made it sound interesting. So I gave it a go.

If you have ever seen the Edge of Tomorrow, you should be familiar with the concept. A man finds himself the victim of a home invasion, and when he dies he wakes up in bed, only to experience the same thing over again. He has been stuck in an endless time loop, and must work his way out of it to make his way to safety. Each time he dies and starts the loop over again, he discovers something new about what is going on around him.

The movie is set in a dystopian future, and not much about this future is explained. You just kind of learn about it as you go. I found the whole thing to be really fascinating and really mind bending. I loved Edge of Tomorrow. Loved Groundhog Day. Loved Source Code. I loved that episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation where the Enterprise kept getting blown up. Apparently I am a big fan of time loops.

The only thing about the film that I didn't like was the ending. I always have been and always will be a hater of open ended endings in movies. I want answers, damn it. I want a solid and concrete ending. And this movie definitely did not provide that in any way whatsoever. Still, though - the movie as a whole was good enough to make me forgive the way it ended.




I have been meaning to watch this for a few years now but for some reason it keeps slipping off my radar. My work schedule has recently changed so I find myself with a lot more time when it is dark out to watch movies, so when I was checking out my movie shelf and saw this, I knew that the time was right.

Apparently this movie is one of the more accurate representations of life during the Vietnam War. And it is very brutal. I could never have done it. Bad conditions, constantly living under the fear of attack. The sense of hopelessness being out there. It was hell on Earth. This movie, however, focuses less on the actual war and more on the interpersonal relationships between members of the platoon. Each character has his own unique and distinct personality, and you really feel like you get to know everyone in the movie.

Some of the characters, though - you start to wish you didn't know. Like the ruthless Sergeant Barnes, who treats people like chess pieces and only cares about winning. And he will kill anyone who disagrees with his methodology. And Bunny, who seems to get off on all the killing and violence around him. One of the most disturbing scenes in the whole movie is when the troops enter a Vietnamese village and starting mistreating its people. Killing innocents, raping women. A major divide happens during this scene, and you can really tell the difference between the good and the bad. And this divide ultimately comes to a head later on in the film.

This was a really great movie, and a lock to make my top five for the month. It may even be top five for the year material. I liked it a lot - and it really stuck with me even after I was done watching it. That is the sign of a truly great movie in my books.




I'm usually not big on war movies, not that you can really tell by the fact that I watched Platoon and Saving Private Ryan back to back. But Platoon inspired me to get out and watch a few more war movies to see if anything would affect me as deeply as that movie did.

I will be the first to say that Saving Private Ryan is definitely not as good as Platoon. While Platoon was all about the characters and very driven by the interpersonal conflict between them, Saving Private Ryan is more about the big battles and the explosions and the death and the carnage of war. Not to say that this is a bad movie by any stretch of the imagination. Or even that that is what it is all about is killing. Because it is not.

This movie definitely gives a very accurate representation of life during World War 2. One of the first scenes of the film - the storming of the beach at Normandy - is as iconic as it gets. I remember hearing stories back when this movie first came out of veterans who had to get up and leave in the movie theater because it was so lifelike. And I have to give Steven Spielberg props for this because it really is an amazing scene. And it is not just the one scene that is amazing - the whole movie accurately depicts the senseless violence, chaos, and brutality of war.

This is a great movie, but the reason I didn't like it as much as Platoon is because I felt less of a bond with the characters. Sure, some of the characters I really feel I got to know, but so many of them died over the course of the movie that it started to lose its emotional impact after a while. Plus (and you may or may not consider this a valid criticism) the movie is extremely long. I have a short attention span, so it was easier for my mind to wander off during this film than it was during Platoon.

This movie is a lock to make my top five for the month, but when it comes to my year end ranking it basically has no shot to win because it will always play second fiddle to Platoon in my books.




I had forgotten how good this movie was. I originally saw this movie a few times years and years ago. While I liked it, I was never really too crazy about it. There was always a lot of things going on around me as I would attempt to watch the movie. I enjoyed its basic concept, but I was never really able to get too into it.

It has always been something I have wanted to revisit, however. And this year I finally got the chance. I found that I enjoyed the movie much, much more than I had back in the day. From the very beginning to the very end, this movie held my attention. Which in and of itself is a rare feat considering how poor my attention span is.

The movie is very well acted, with great performances all around by Geoffrey Rush, Kate Winslet, Joaquin Phoenix, Michael Caine, and all the supporting cast. Rush in particular is fantastic in this movie. I become oddly intrigued by the Marquis De Sade and even researched him and his background after the movie ended.

The movie is dark, but it also has a lot of humor and a lot of sex stuff to keep anyone interested. I put out the appearance of a normal, boring kind of guy. But deep inside I am a little twisted - so a lot of stuff in this movie really fascinated me and got me involved in the film. Anyone with a bit of a darker side to them that they normally keep hidden can probably relate, especially when it comes to this movie.

I thought that this was great, and I would be surprised to see it not make the top five for the month.

Side note: I don't think Kate Winslet has ever looked better in a movie before. I was fawning over her basically the entire film. Simone may have Kate Winslet beat though. I don't recall thinking anything of her the first few times I saw this movie over ten years ago - but watching it now. Wow. She may be the most perfect woman ever created.


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Moving On


The first few choices are pretty easy. Platoon, Saving Private Ryan, ARQ, and Quills I enjoyed a ton and no doubt are deserving of top five honors for the month.

The fifth slot will have to go to a movie that I considered mediocre. And after a lot of careful deliberating I am going to have to go with the Visit because it is the only movie that didn't have any boring moments. I never looked at the clock, never started playing on my phone during this movie. It kept me entertained, kept me guessing the whole way through. It has no chance in hell of winning my year end ranking - but hey I needed five movies so it moves on by default.

Now that September is under wraps, that means that nine months are out of the way. Just three left in the year, and then my ranking can officially begin. Here are the top five movies I have chosen from each month so far this year, with September's films added to the list:


Star Wars: The Force Unleashed
Cake
American Sniper
Predator
Friday the 13th Part 2
Locke
Evil Dead
Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter
Elysium
Snowpiercer
Room
Manson Family Vacation
Deadpool
Goodnight, Mommy
Unforgiven
Big Driver
The Martian
Pixels
JFK: The Smoking Gun
Crimson Peak
It
Creed
The Revenant
Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith
No Good Deed
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Krampus
The Fellowship of the Ring Extended Edition
The Night of the Living Dead
Mad Max: Fury Road
Forrest Gump
The Little Rascals
Deliverance
The Two Towers
Zombieland
Coming to America
American History X
Ghostbusters
Darkman
Return of the King
ARQ
Quills
The Visit
Platoon
Saving Private Ryan

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